No, I'm not physically ill, but I am worn out to the point of feeling that way. Not because I'm lacking sleep, though I should probably try to get some soon.
I'm sick and tired of people who lack any form of imagination. And no, I'm not talking about people who aren't able to come up with vastly detailed fantastical worlds or a new invention that will revolutionise the 21st Century. I'm talking about people who are so caught up with their myopic views of the world and reality that as soon as something comes along that disturbs it slightly, then fear it. They react badly. They think that it is evil or wrong or stupid. What gives these people the right to believe that what goes on inside their own head is supreme...that
everyone should be thinking that way, otherwise you're branded an outcast or undesirable!?!?!
I've been debating and debating until I can't debate any more with people about issues that I hold very dear. Issues that require a degree of empathy and compassion. I'm not saying that my methods are the best, nor am I saying that my views are either...but I still want to share them...I still value social justice!
I always tend to take up a very bold stance on current affairs...in Australia, in particular (because that's where I am!). I've become the stereotypical 20 year old who has an opinion about everything and pushes them down people's throats....which is exactly the sort of thing I hate in other people...I've become an "evangelist"..."dogmatic" in issues of social inequality and equity.
But I still feel inclined to be this way...because whenever I see or hear someone spouting some misinformed, close minded bullshit I get an uncontrollable rage inside me which I channel into words.
And then...when the storm clears and the damage has been done...I feel regret...regret that I may have upset someone, the person I was debating with...may tarnished whatever view they may have had of me...may have weakened a friendship.
But fuck it...I just can't stomach it when people don't know or won't let themselves think
for themselves!
Anyway, I think I've blown it again tonight...on facebook of all things...
Yet another same-sex marriage conversation that I've plunged into with my sword in my right hand and my shield in my left, defending the ideologies that I hold dear. The problem with attending a fundamentalist Christian school is that you grow up with those people...and a lot of them stay in that mindframe and do not venture out to realise that the world is a much bigger, much more diverse place than they thought...and to disenfranchise other people is exactly the thing they're preaching about what we
shouldn't do...
Gah....I'm starting to go off on a tangent again...my rage just overcomes me and I talk and talk and talk...I'm the very thing I hate. But I feel I need to be...