Wonder if there really is such a thing as a parallel universe. The one person whose call, text, smoke signals, whatever, can make my day doesn't bother and the last person I want to deal with has been blowing up my damn phone!

Unless an astronomer or astrophysicist would prove otherwise - no.
I just simply call them dreams to some extent.
They say dreams make life bearable just for that moment in time.

I wish it was only a bad dream....

Back after a sabbatical that included some surgery on my wrist. Still in the recovery/rehabilitation stage but dealing with a mix of cabin fever, anxiety, depression and uselessness. Oh yeah, I turned 48 yesterday as well.

I can't help but look around and say "it wasn't supposed to still be this way". Granted I only have broad and general pictures of what was supposed to be different but I never thought I'd still be unhirable and undateable. This sucks!

Not totally sure what or where I'd be, other than not here. Thought I'd have a decent job that at least paid the bills, have an actual house with a garage, back yard, and some more square footage. Maybe she was going to be part of this pretty picture maybe someone else is, who can say. I know what my preference would be but that's obviously not 100 percent up to me. I just want to look around and say "this is where I'm meant to be." Am i asking too much?

Happy B-day! Though I am not sure if you hate b-days like some people do.
Also how is your wrist doing?

Yes I know what you mean in terms of wtf is happening in life. What sucks is that no matter how young or old someone is life does not pan out the way as expected - at least for most people.

No you are not asking too much at all. People who want to take over and ruin other's lives are asking way too much!

Though sorry that you are not feeling so great atm.

Thanks. Actually miss our exchanges. Wrist is healing slowly but surely. Just not handling anything very well. Seems like I spent my 20s not thinking ahead, my 30s in a marriage that never should have happened and my 40s trying to put together some kind of life. I'm inching up on 50 now and feel like I'm running out of time. Plus it's 2:30 in the morning and I'm just getting home from the emergency vet clinic. My beloved golden retriever is in doggie icu.

But other than that I'm on top of the friggin world!

9:51 am the sedative takes hold, and he lays his head in my lap. By 9:57 he quietly says goodbye and leaves this world for the rainbow bridge where he no longer suffers, his friends are waiting for him and he can be a happy go lucky goofball again. We went trough a lot in the 11 years we spent together. He was my loyal and trusted sidekick, my one constant in an ever chaotic world. I'll miss you my big furry pinhead, but you deserve to be at peace.

Kept it together for the most part today which is a good surprise. The hardest part is facing the fact that I am now completely alone. I can accept that dogs don't live forever but what else can happen to me this year? Why is it that anything that matters to me either gets taken away, or leaves of her own free will?

To whom it may concern:

When I ask "what else is going to happen to me" I am speaking rhetorically/ It is NOT a challenge!