:( what can I do......
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:( what can I do......

This is a discussion on :( what can I do...... within the Troubled Loved Ones forums, part of the Depression Forums category; but sit and watch him destory himself? I can't talk about it to him as he doesn't like me involed ...

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Old 05-10-10, 09:27 AM   #1
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but sit and watch him destory himself?

I can't talk about it to him as he doesn't like me involed in this part of him.His sucidal live, his metal health.

Noone takes him seriously, noone wants to give him help but make it worse for him.

And this is left me with tears in my eyes cause theres nothing I can do.

He set me task do to, he said at the end he will marry me if I complete them but yet its come to this, where he is saying fuck it and it leaves me with nothing an empty promise.I have not completed a whole list yet.

I feel so hopeless, I feel so empty.

Iam also thinking u know what if u leave me I will join u.

:( what else can I do??

.....................
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Old 05-10-10, 12:30 PM   #2
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ok one, he gave u a list to do compelte in order to marry u? seriously?
have u tried talking to him, sayingthat u do take him seriously, u understand and u want to help? but the fact that hes saying "do these things or i wont marry u" sounds like hes puttingu threw an awfully tough test. can i ask wats on the list?
i think u hsould throw away the list, tell him ur here forever and if he loves u, he needs to stop putting u threw this. diont let him use his mental state as an excuse. noexcuse is good enough for breaking ur heart over and over like this. if he loves u and does really want to marry u, he'll step up, let u in, and stop hurting u like this. u deserve better, and he needs to no that.
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Old 05-10-10, 01:05 PM   #3
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I have tried and tried but to no end of this.
My heart breaks more and more every second this goes on.
I tried saying I want to help but he won't let the walls go down.
Simply things like have fun, be triusted not to fight, complete a video game, math test stuff like that.

I just want to be happy, I want him to be happy but its never going to happen is it?
I mean right now I am sure he is ODing and theres nothing I can do as I live far away.I just don't know anymore :(
thnx for replying
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Old 05-10-10, 01:40 PM   #4
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u need to tell him that he needs to stop hurting u and to make an effort to let u in. and im really curious, wat eactly r these tasks hes assigned u?
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a strong woman is one who can build a firm foundation from the bricks thrown at her

Is this the life that you lead or the life that's led for you? Will take the road that's been laid out before you

the sun will set on this my dear
your labors aren't in vain
your blistered and your burned from it
your wounds are gonna heal
steadfast my love the end is near
just keep your eyes ahead
grab hold of me
I'll help you there
your never on your own
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Old 05-10-10, 01:52 PM   #5
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Simply things like have fun, be triusted not to fight, complete a video game, math test stuff like that.


I have tried to tell him but it just doesn't work.wonder why I sometimes bother? I love him really I do but its hard with this.making me worse. and iI guess he doesn't care??
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Old 05-10-10, 03:43 PM   #6
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math tests and video games?? so wat u have to prove to him ur smart and cant beat him at a game?? as for the others, they shouldnt be tasks, they should be promises. like, my bf and i have made promises to eachother like be speicfic when talking about our feelings, bc ill say i feel shitty, and he doesnt no if that means i feel alone, sad, miserable, irritated, ect. we make [romises like that to avoid fights. but if hes giving u these tasks, y not them to him? tell him to he cant argue with u and he has to take u some place so u ca nhave fun.
he may love u, btu the fact he says fuck it (to me it sounds like hes saying fukc it and walking away) means (to me) hes having a hard time expresing it or showing it. this could be a good starting point to get past his stone walls. tell how u feel and aks him to prove he loves u. if he says ok and makes the tiniest bit of effort, make a huge deal out of it! all guys love giving there love attention, but someimtes they dont no how big on effect it has (this was my bfs problem a the begninngin). also, when he does make an effort, tell him how proud u are of him.
but u have to let him no wats going on with u 2, it cant be just him with the problems, he needs to no about u 2, and maybe telling him about ur depression then it might help him feel more comfortabel with u as u tell him wat u need from him.
if says no to anything or denies it or says "i shouldnt have to prove i love u" then he may not be able to give u wat u need or love u they u should be. and if thats the case, u 2 should take a break from eachother so u can see where u stand in the relationship. jsut a few days to think things threw.
someitmes i worry myself if my bf (with depression and severe anxiety) is able to give me wat i need or is able to love me the way i deserve, but he makes an effort to show me does and he can, and thats all i can ask for.
__________________
a strong woman is one who can build a firm foundation from the bricks thrown at her

Is this the life that you lead or the life that's led for you? Will take the road that's been laid out before you

the sun will set on this my dear
your labors aren't in vain
your blistered and your burned from it
your wounds are gonna heal
steadfast my love the end is near
just keep your eyes ahead
grab hold of me
I'll help you there
your never on your own
heartfilledlies is offline   Reply With Quote
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