Sorry could not resist and of course other people would have funnier and creative answer to these.
1. What brings you here? Transit.
2. Have you ever seen a counselor before? No I have not dated one.
3. What is the problem from your viewpoint? You tell me.
4. How does this problem typically make you feel? On top of the freaking world (very sarcastic)
5. What makes the problem better? An actual solution.
6. If you could wave a magic wand, what positive changes you would make happen in your life? You really do not want to know.
7. Overall how would you describe your mood? Homicidal count?
8. What do you expect from the counseling process? Nothing but a hole in my wallet.
9. What would it take to make you feel more content, happier and more satisfied? Your job, perks, benefits and everything that comes with it.
10. Do you consider yourself to have a low, average, or high interpersonal IQ? Test me...