"Thoughts" are they truly just that
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"Thoughts" are they truly just that

This is a discussion on "Thoughts" are they truly just that within the Suicide forums, part of the Suicide Forums category; Ive had these thoughts running around in my head. Thoughts of suicide there seems to be no end to these ...

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Old 02-23-12, 10:22 PM   #1
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Default "Thoughts" are they truly just that

Ive had these thoughts running around in my head. Thoughts of suicide there seems to be no end to these thoughts. I often times am scared that they truly are not thoughts but realities. Realities that I know I can make real. This depression is so horrible every time I have some time of sun light it just gets replaced with darkness. Why not make this darkness eternal. I cant say much to my family my drs know and are worried so I look elsewhere for support which is why I am here. Tonight is one of those nights that I worry about the thoughts becoming reality so that is another reason I am here. Anyway that is all for tonight I am going to do my best to go to sleep but we shall see.
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Old 02-24-12, 04:18 AM   #2
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Have you managed to get any sleep?

Sorry you are feeling this way, I now how you feel as I have been there before. The fact that you are questioning these thoughts is a positive step. You say you have your family but you can't talk to them, is this because you feel they don't understand or that they are unsupportive or for another reason.

"Thoughts" are just "thoughts" they are intangible, this is what separates them from reality, thinking about suicide is one thing, actually acting on these thoughts is another thing altogether. You say you have periods of sunlight through the darkness. Although it seems that the darkness will take over, you need to cling onto the periods of sunlight and these will eventually become more frequent and you will slowly but surely begin to feel a little better.

You don't say what has got you to this point? You don't have to share if you don't want to, but more information might be helpful.

Anyway I wish you all the best
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Old 02-24-12, 04:22 AM   #3
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Hi Roxies World Now,

How did you sleep? Im so sorry that you have these thoughts.. Have you tried writing them all down, or expressing the thoughts through dancing, art?

We are all here for you ...

xX
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Old 02-24-12, 07:06 AM   #4
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I was able to get a little sleep but my mind just stayed on the thoughts of suicide. It is sooo easy to think things would be better off for every body if I just did it. I feel like I cant talk to my family because to them it is just me being me and they seem to go on high alert. I really dont want them on high alert as it will draw attention to me. Yes I admit there are times I need help but I really dont want my family calling my Dr 50 thousand times. I know they do this because they worry about me I get all that,
It is sooo easy to forget about those times of light when you have more periods of darkness. I cant enjoy anything anymore, everything is a chore with this depression life is horrible. It is so frustrating when you do what your being told my therapist for instance has encouraged me not to drink no matter how bad things seem to get he has suggested exercise to help during the down times and none of this is working. Could it be that I am ment to suffer for the rest of my days.
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Old 02-24-12, 08:42 AM   #5
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It is really tough, but hang on in there. Things WILL NOT be better for anyone if you are not here anymore, your family would miss you terribly. I know that when you feel the way you are feeling right now it is difficult to see anything from anyone else's perspective, you can only concentrate on how you are feeling. The therapists advice on no drinking is obviously because alcohol is a depressive and with you the way you are right now it would make you feel lower and exacerbate your symptoms. It is all easy for me to say, although I enjoy the odd drink on medication, but I know I shouldn't. Remember exercise doesn't just mean heavy duty - the gym etc. I found that when I was at my lowest, all I could do was just walk aimlessly for miles all day. At the time I didn't realise it, but the exercise must have helped and the fresh air definitely would have done. What about taking a short walk?

What is the Dr doing for you, are you on any meds?
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Old 02-24-12, 03:06 PM   #6
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Its easy for me to see how things would be without me as mentally i am not here any how and physically i spend so much time in bed that im not really around anyway. Ive been absent due to past hospitlizations from failed attempts that i got to see how things worked without me, I think this is perhaps why im spending so much time thinking i dont want the next time to be a failed attempt. The Dr has put me on a new med in addition to what i already take but that one is for schizophrenia I really dont understand the coralation but I do what the dr says. Again this is what makes it so frustrating to me, I do do and do and yet the depression keeps comming back.
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Old 02-24-12, 05:35 PM   #7
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i been on meds for nearly two years now and desperatly want to get off them. i been moved around different groups of health proffessionals so many times that i dont know who has the final say anymore. i just want to feel like me for once, sober and no meds, i dont have a clue how that will feel and excites me to know that within a year i might feel this. i was stoned and drunk or on meds from 14 to now (25) and just cant wait for that moment when the doc says from 2mg a day, than 1 a day than half than quarter etc. i dont know what it feels like to be without some substance running through my bloodstream, hopefully i wont be dissapointed when that day comes.
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