Fuck the world and everything in it!
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Fuck the world and everything in it!

This is a discussion on Fuck the world and everything in it! within the Suicide forums, part of the Suicide Forums category; Yeah, another redundant statement, but it's exactly how I feel about this life and this world. I'm fed up with ...

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Old 07-27-11, 07:07 PM   #1
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Yeah, another redundant statement, but it's exactly how I feel about this life and this world. I'm fed up with this shit. I can't even find the words for how pissed off and fed up I am at everything in this whole fucking world. I can't think of one good thing about being alive anymore; I have literally nothing to live for... no hope or chance of moving out of my mother's house and I really want to 'cause I'm tired of being stuck at a parent's house and not having complete freedom/independence (even if I sold all my stuff, what little I have, and torture myself for years up the fucking ass to get that oh-so-coveted College degree that would probably take me 2 times longer than your average student to obtain and would be worthless by the time I got it. FUCK COLLEGE! IT'S NO FUCKING BETTER THAN HIGH SCHOOL; in some ways WORSE! IF I'M FORCED TO GO BACK I'MMA BURN THAT MOTHAFUCKA DOWN!) No hope of getting a better job 'cause where I am the economy's fucked up and HR people fucking hate me for no fucking reason even though I work my ass off to try and get a new job and be positive or whatever the hell it is they want out of me. No chance of getting a girlfriend/wife (though that's so hopeless that it's not even on my priority list anymore). No chance of getting a singing career started, and that's my fucking final life-line; I put videos of myself singing on youtube, and there's hardly any views... not even any likes or dislikes... NO FUCKING FEEDBACK! No chance of becoming anything worthwhile to anybody, not even myself.

So to make a long story short, fuckit. There's no talking me out of this, so don't give me any of these hippie ass Polyanna posts about how "It's all how you look at it" or "You just have to change things" or "Be grateful you don't live in Ethiopia" or whoring Gandhi quotes or hippie quotes or or Bible quotes or self-help fake guru quotes or magical thinking faux-esoteric quotes... my life is already odious enough without people telling me that shit; saying stuff like that is like pouring a bunch of powdered sugar on a pile of dog shit and telling me it's a fucking chocolate cake-doughnut. I've made up my mind... sure, there's a chance I might live and maybe live a better life, but those chances are so slim that I may as well start playing the fucking California Lottery if I choose to live for 45+ more redundant years.

I know it's likely someone out there's going to post "Oh that's SEW NAWT TREW! YEW HAVE LAWTS TEW LIV 4!!1!1$#oen1!" KISS MY HAPPY LITTLE PINOY ASS! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT'S LIKE BEING ME SO GO FUCK YOURSELF! ... anyways, before I go off on another rant, I'll digress. Since I've my mind made up and am not operating on any form of hope for anything anymore, I'm probably not going to reply back to this thread... so please don't get offended when/if I don't reply.
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Last edited by Ella; 07-29-11 at 03:56 PM.
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Old 07-27-11, 07:50 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by WTFAnime View Post
Yeah, another redundant statement, but it's exactly how I feel about this life and this world. I'm fed up with this shit. I can't even find the words for how pissed off and fed up I am at everything in this whole fucking world. I can't think of one good thing about being alive anymore; I have literally nothing to live for... no hope or chance of moving out of my mother's house and I really want to 'cause I'm tired of being stuck at a parent's house and not having complete freedom/independence (even if I sold all my stuff, what little I have, and torture myself for years up the fucking ass to get that oh-so-coveted College degree that would probably take me 2 times longer than your average student to obtain and would be worthless by the time I got it. FUCK COLLEGE! IT'S NO FUCKING BETTER THAN HIGH SCHOOL; in some ways WORSE! IF I'M FORCED TO GO BACK I'MMA BURN THAT MOTHAFUCKA DOWN!) No hope of getting a better job 'cause where I am the economy's fucked up and HR people fucking hate me for no fucking reason even though I work my ass off to try and get a new job and be positive or whatever the hell it is they want out of me. No chance of getting a girlfriend/wife (though that's so hopeless that it's not even on my priority list anymore). No chance of getting a singing career started, and that's my fucking final life-line; I put videos of myself singing on youtube, and there's hardly any views... not even any likes or dislikes... NO FUCKING FEEDBACK! No chance of becoming anything worthwhile to anybody, not even myself.

So to make a long story short, fuckit. There's no talking me out of this, so don't give me any of these hippie ass Polyanna posts about how "It's all how you look at it" or "You just have to change things" or "Be grateful you don't live in Ethiopia" or whoring Gandhi quotes or hippie quotes or or Bible quotes or self-help fake guru quotes or magical thinking faux-esoteric quotes... my life is already odious enough without people telling me that shit; saying stuff like that is like pouring a bunch of powdered sugar on a pile of dog shit and telling me it's a fucking chocolate cake-doughnut. I've made up my mind... sure, there's a chance I might live and maybe live a better life, but those chances are so slim that I may as well start playing the fucking California Lottery if I choose to live for 45+ more redundant years.

I know it's likely someone out there's going to post "Oh that's SEW NAWT TREW! YEW HAVE LAWTS TEW LIV 4!!1!1$#oen1!" KISS MY HAPPY LITTLE PINOY ASS! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT'S LIKE BEING ME SO GO FUCK YOURSELF! ... anyways, before I go off on another rant, I'll digress. Since I've my mind made up and am not operating on any form of hope for anything anymore, I'm probably not going to reply back to this thread... so please don't get offended when/if I don't reply.
Hi what is your name? I dont even know you, but I love you and want to get to know you... My names Ben, and Im from New Zealand.

Last edited by Ella; 07-29-11 at 03:57 PM.
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Old 07-27-11, 08:11 PM   #3
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WTFAnime, have you ever thought of getting a dog? Dogs are awesome. They fill those blank, lonely spaces. And learning to take care of one will help you learn to take care of yourself.

It's really just not productive to focus on all of your flaws like this, anyway.

Quote:
YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT'S LIKE BEING ME
Ha HA! No, I clearly don't. Even though three years ago I was ranting about suicide constantly. I repeated the same arguments about my flaws and how I wasn't going to ever succeed at anything, and I shot down anyone who tried to tell me otherwise.
I did that until my life got worse directly because of it. And then I realized, "Shit, what I'm actually experiencing is not an enlightened state of mind. It's actually a mental disease, and it's ruining everything I have left."

I could have gotten help for it, but by then I didn't need help.
Not that I got everything figured out, mind you. I hate self-help crap too. I think there's nothing in the entire world that can teach you to do what you must... okay that's just gonna come off like a lame quote. I don't know.

But yeah, you need to figure it out for yourself. I don't think I or anyone here can help you. You're not alone, exactly; you can rant whatever you like. I'm just saying I think you need to figure out what's wrong inside your head and delete it. It's hard for us to do that for you. Barring that, there's therapy sessions.
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Old 07-27-11, 09:18 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by daftone View Post
WTFAnime, have you ever thought of getting a dog? Dogs are awesome. They fill those blank, lonely spaces. And learning to take care of one will help you learn to take care of yourself.

It's really just not productive to focus on all of your flaws like this, anyway.

Ha HA! No, I clearly don't. Even though three years ago I was ranting about suicide constantly. I repeated the same arguments about my flaws and how I wasn't going to ever succeed at anything, and I shot down anyone who tried to tell me otherwise.
I did that until my life got worse directly because of it. And then I realized, "Shit, what I'm actually experiencing is not an enlightened state of mind. It's actually a mental disease, and it's ruining everything I have left."

I could have gotten help for it, but by then I didn't need help.
Not that I got everything figured out, mind you. I hate self-help crap too. I think there's nothing in the entire world that can teach you to do what you must... okay that's just gonna come off like a lame quote. I don't know.

But yeah, you need to figure it out for yourself. I don't think I or anyone here can help you. You're not alone, exactly; you can rant whatever you like. I'm just saying I think you need to figure out what's wrong inside your head and delete it. It's hard for us to do that for you. Barring that, there's therapy sessions.
Ok, so I said I'd probably not reply... I lied. I just have to specify a few more things.

I'd love to have a dog or better yet a cat... (fuck that, I wish I WERE a cat... wouldn't it be nice to sleep well over half the day, eat, jump on high places, scratch shit up, chill under the bed, not worry about any human problems? anyways...) but guess what? My mom's deathly allergic so I can't have either, and I can't move out even with friends 'cause I don't have the fucking money! I have a shitty fucking low-paying job where I can barely afford to pay my mother so I can live in the house and use the internet and eat at least once a day and satisfy my caffeine and masturbation addictions, but really, that's about it. I don't even have enough to take a fucking vacation!

And guess what? My life was worse BEFORE I felt like shit every fucking day I live! I've been teased, looked down upon, made look like a motherfucking RETARD, ostracized, even hazed BEFORE I started feeling this way. I don't want any attention and I don't want anybody's fucking sympathy. I just want to commit a ritual of suicide in peace so I can go gracefully instead of when I'm old, weak, fucked, jaded, angry, and cynical... even moreso than now. But go ahead and laugh... people laugh at me and talk shit about me and talk down to me all the time; I'm sure everybody'll also be laughing and talking shit when I'm fucking dead and dripping! Guess what else? I'm getting counseling and IT DOESN'T FUCKING WORK! ALL THEY EVER OFFER IS A PAID FRIEND OR A PILL PUSHER! NOPE, ALL MY PROBLEMS ARE STILL FUCKING HERE! FUCK! FUCK THIS SHIT, AND FUCK LIFE AND FUCK THIS PLANET AND FUCK EVERYTHING ON IT! I HATE EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE, but the truth is, I hate myself the most of all...

Skipping the fryer bit, thanks for the reply... at least you actually heard me out when I said I didn't want any hippie bullshit. Maybe I am sick, or maybe I'm one of the only sane person in a realm of insanity... I don't know. What does it matter... it's all over anyways... haven't decide how yet, but people have been killing themselves since the beginning of human existence, something HAS to work.
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Last edited by Ella; 07-29-11 at 03:59 PM.
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Old 07-27-11, 10:21 PM   #5
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I don't understand why you couldn't move in with friends. I mean if the rent you're paying right now is too much, wouldn't roommates be more reasonable?
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Old 07-27-11, 10:47 PM   #6
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1. I don't have many friends at all... the ones I do have treat me like I'm either an annoyance or some sort of figure that should be seen but not heard
2. Most of them are either already shit poor living either at home or already live in a full as apartment.
3. Rent in California is RECOCKULOUSLY EXPENSIVE AND INFLATED! It costs well over 500 dollars a month just to live in the fucking ghetto!

Fuck it, I have no future soon anyways, so I don't even know why I care.
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Last edited by Ella; 07-29-11 at 04:01 PM.
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Old 07-28-11, 12:13 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by YOUARELOVED View Post
Hi what is your name? I dont even know you, but I love you and want to get to know you... My names Ben, and Im from New Zealand.
I prefer to stay anonymous except for when I send messages, but for now you can call me Dee. I just wanted to say that from what I've seen, NZ is a very beautiful place; I had a good dream that I lived there.
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