02-12-17, 09:54 PM
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#11
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Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: corner
Posts: 201
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Maybe there is some way you can look beyond life like that. I hope you can find it, because you seem to enjoy to refute any of my suggestions :p
Whether life is just survival or aspiring, you do have an opportunity for both.
Also, I would like to know where you got that statistic.
According to shrm, 88% of american employees are satisfied with their job https://www.shrm.org/hr-today/trends...workforce.aspx
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02-13-17, 08:10 AM
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#12
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TTL Bronze Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 6,614
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https://www.google.com/#q=what+perce...+their+jobs%5C
For some reason, I'm reluctant to use her as an example, but when Oprah was abused and isolated, she discovered books. I know reading gives me a great deal of peace in my solitude.
__________________
High hopes faint on a warm hearth stone; she travels the fastest who travels alone.
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02-14-17, 05:50 PM
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#13
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Banned
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 696
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missread
Maybe there is some way you can look beyond life like that. I hope you can find it, because you seem to enjoy to refute any of my suggestions :p
Whether life is just survival or aspiring, you do have an opportunity for both.
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uh, what are you talking about? I'm just responding to your posts.
How do I have an opportunity for both given my current circumstances?
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02-14-17, 08:33 PM
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#14
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Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: corner
Posts: 201
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Sensual Girl - none of those sources are considered reliable, and most link back to a Gallup poll. I wonder how shrm and gallup got such different numbers :o
Black Sheep - To me it seems like your responses don't give my suggestions a chance.. It just seems like you see the worst in them.
And because you create your aspirations. Everyone has an opportunity to do that.
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02-14-17, 10:31 PM
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#15
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Banned
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 696
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missread
Sensual Girl - none of those sources are considered reliable, and most link back to a Gallup poll. I wonder how shrm and gallup got such different numbers :o
Black Sheep - To me it seems like your responses don't give my suggestions a chance.. It just seems like you see the worst in them.
And because you create your aspirations. Everyone has an opportunity to do that.
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I'm still not sure what suggestions you're talking about??? Anyway, I thought we were just having a conversation. I guess I'm not responding to your posts in the way you hoped. Sorry.
In my opinion, you don't just create aspirations out of thin air. It's something that comes to you naturally. There just isn't that spark for me anymore. Not much inspires or motivates me. I feel numb and lost most of the time. You get that?
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02-15-17, 10:48 AM
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#16
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TTL Bronze Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 6,614
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Are you on meds/St. John's Wort? That might help to an extent.
__________________
High hopes faint on a warm hearth stone; she travels the fastest who travels alone.
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02-15-17, 04:14 PM
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#17
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Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: corner
Posts: 201
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Seeking ways to get better at presenting, finding a larger goal, listening to talks or things that might help... Yeah, I guess you're not. It's okay. You just have a different way of looking at things, but it comes across as a bit rigid.
Yeah, I get that, that's how I feel a lot too. I used to think they were natural as well, until I've reached this point. If they were once there, they still exist in you somewhere. There's just something getting in the way of that, so you have to look for them, create them, or get rid of what ever is in the way.
I don't think we're born with things that we just naturally want to do. We learn our skills, strengths and weaknesses, what we do and don't like simply through living and experiencing. Sometimes it just happens naturally that you find something to aspire to through this process, other times you just have to keep trying and searching. Be open. Try not to hide or avoid things, you never know what will happen. Maybe it's better to find out then to never know.
I've shut myself away for a while now, stopped doing a lot of what I used to, and I know how hard it is to find that motivation again. In this situation, it's a lot harder than it sounds. But it all comes down to little decisions. Should I skip class today because I don't have my work done, or go and be honest with the professor about why? Should I lay in bed an extra hour or get up and read something useful? Granted, there are circumstances where it is more necessary to skip class or sleep, but when they're becoming habits that aren't helping you, it might be time to take an opposite approach.
Perhaps a bigger goal could simply be to find those aspirations again. At least for me, it hasn't been easy, but doing something or trying instead of doing nothing/avoiding has seemed to help a little bit. Before I was just sitting there and waiting, wondering where they went, getting more and more depressed by that thought, thinking what's wrong with me?
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02-15-17, 11:18 PM
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#18
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Banned
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 696
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missread
Seeking ways to get better at presenting, finding a larger goal, listening to talks or things that might help... Yeah, I guess you're not. It's okay. You just have a different way of looking at things, but it comes across as a bit rigid.
Yeah, I get that, that's how I feel a lot too. I used to think they were natural as well, until I've reached this point. If they were once there, they still exist in you somewhere. There's just something getting in the way of that, so you have to look for them, create them, or get rid of what ever is in the way.
I don't think we're born with things that we just naturally want to do. We learn our skills, strengths and weaknesses, what we do and don't like simply through living and experiencing. Sometimes it just happens naturally that you find something to aspire to through this process, other times you just have to keep trying and searching. Be open. Try not to hide or avoid things, you never know what will happen. Maybe it's better to find out then to never know.
I've shut myself away for a while now, stopped doing a lot of what I used to, and I know how hard it is to find that motivation again. In this situation, it's a lot harder than it sounds. But it all comes down to little decisions. Should I skip class today because I don't have my work done, or go and be honest with the professor about why? Should I lay in bed an extra hour or get up and read something useful? Granted, there are circumstances where it is more necessary to skip class or sleep, but when they're becoming habits that aren't helping you, it might be time to take an opposite approach.
Perhaps a bigger goal could simply be to find those aspirations again. At least for me, it hasn't been easy, but doing something or trying instead of doing nothing/avoiding has seemed to help a little bit. Before I was just sitting there and waiting, wondering where they went, getting more and more depressed by that thought, thinking what's wrong with me?
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First off, the original topic of this thread was about me not wanting to do presentations and being frustrated with having to do them. So no, I'm not looking for advice about "getting better" at them. Second, I don't find TED talks helpful or inspiring - and I've seen that specific one before. Do you expect me to just pretend to like them?
Look, I'm grateful for your replies even if I disagree with them. But I don't appreciate you assuming that I'm "doing nothing/hiding/avoiding." You don't know me well enough to say that. I don't have much patience for unfair assumptions or victim blaming. If you feel you aren't doing enough, that's fine. Please don't project it onto me. I'm doing the best I can and have been continuously putting myself through hell over the past year. I'm curious as to what exactly you think I'm avoiding, aside from presentations.
Finally, I didn't say we were "born" with aspirations. I said that I think they come naturally. I guess there are a few things I want in life right now. Others might consider them shallow goals. The problem is that I can't achieve them because of the limitations currently in my life.
Last edited by Black Sheep; 02-15-17 at 11:21 PM.
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02-15-17, 11:20 PM
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#19
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Banned
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 696
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SensualGirl
Are you on meds/St. John's Wort? That might help to an extent.
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I'm currently on meds for anxiety. Took SSRIs in the past and it was a nightmare. I haven't tried St. John's Wort though. Are there any nasty side effects?
btw I saw what you wrote about crisis and it's nothing to be embarrassed about. When I was in outpatient, I learned that quite a few people do that. I might try it at some point because therapy sucks, lol.
Last edited by Black Sheep; 02-15-17 at 11:25 PM.
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02-16-17, 10:58 AM
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#20
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Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: corner
Posts: 201
My Mood:
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Ok. Sorry. I hope things get better for you.
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