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-   -   I love it here, but... (https://www.takethislife.com/ttl-cafe/i-love-here-but-23439/)

Sweet Denial 04-25-09 03:39 PM

I love it here, but...
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love it here on TTL. It's just that... I'm not getting the support that I need. It's no one's fault, so I don't want anyone to blame themselves. It's just that this place, as lovely as it may be, isn't helping me through my depression. It's only prolonging me doing anything about it. Which isn't what I need. I need therapy, and professional help. Which means I can't let myself come here anymore. I know that sounds really harsh, but it's true. I simply can't. If I let myself continue to come here, I won't seek out the help that I really need, because I'll continue to let myself believe that coming here is going to make everything better. Which, don't get me wrong on this, this place does help me through situations sometimes... but that's all it does. Helps me through situations. TTL isn't going to cure my depression; it's just going to make heartache go away for a little while. You know, help things seem like they're not so shitty. And yes, if that kind of thing worked for me, then I'd keep coming here. But it doesn't. I have a pessimistic mindset, which thus means that coming here isn't helping me much. I complain about my problems, you all help the best you can (for which I am IMMENSELY grateful) but at the end of the day, the core to my problem still exists. My depression isn't going away.

I'm not saying goodbye. It's more like... See ya later. I have a feeling I'll be back, at some point. Just not for awhile. Not until I can get some professional help. Get myself into therapy, or on medication or something. At which point, perhaps coming back here will become an option again. For right now, staying is not.

((((((((((Hugs)))))))))) to everyone. I'll be praying for each and everyone one of you, as you all progress on your journeys to a life free from depression. As well, I'm going to miss you all greatly. But I know this is what's best for me.

Much love,

silent cry 04-25-09 03:52 PM

i understand SD,
i will miss your presence around here, and look forward to seeing you again sometime in the future- when things are better for you.
good luck with everything. and remember this place will always have a place for you.

take care. xxx

WoundedHeart 04-26-09 06:31 PM

Get the things that you need to in order and take care of yourself first. You are loved.

Mousey 04-26-09 08:00 PM

We'll be here whenever you need us sweet, take care and I hope you can find the help you're looking for.


timmy13 04-26-09 08:09 PM

i'll look out for you when your back. take care sweet. we'll miss you. but your safety and health comes first.


surfcaster 04-26-09 08:33 PM

i agree with what you said sweet, this site was never meant to replace real proffesional help, it is a suppliment to that, you need to do what is right for you, i'll look for you when you return.

until then
peace love and hugs

Sweet Denial 04-27-09 09:08 AM


I can't leave. I need this place. It's my addiction. My safe haven, if you will. I need this place to come to talk about things in my life. Things I can't talk about with anyone else. Or even things I can, and I just want someone to share it with. I need you all, because I love you, and I miss you all, even if it's only been two days.

Delta40 04-27-09 09:31 AM

Hey SD, you can still get professional help and use TTL. There is no reason why one should discount the other. everyone agrees ttl is not a substitute for professional help in managing depression. consider it more like a group of friends who share common experiences and/or goals.


Mitza 04-27-09 11:45 AM

I am glad to hear that you want to get professional help. I agree with Delta, you can still be around here if you want. :smile: Maybe try to spend more time in the lighter sections of the forum if you feel reading in the depression section etc. makes you feel worse? Remember that you don't need to reply to posts all the time. It is ok to take a break. :wink:
Wishing you the best in search for therapy. We are here to support you.
((((((((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))))))
Love you my friend. :smile:

silent cry 04-27-09 02:34 PM

aww SD, as delta said- you can always get professional help and use TTL aswel.
we can support u thru it all. xx

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