Life after domestic abuse?
 

Sorry to hear that. :hug: To me it sounds someway similar to Stockholm syndrom. If she hurt you (without your consent, nowadays sado mazo is popular), she doesnt deserve you. Dont think about what you used to love, think about what you love now.

Maybe you just aren't used to the new routine? Maybe you feel it requires too much concentration right now? Just do what you need to do when you are ready and not a millisecond too early or too late (by which I mean, don't let yourself get overwhelmed but don't let yourself get bored either).


Concentrate on loving what part of her is good, and knowing that it's best for both of you that you left. Encourage her to get help. Feel good, and encourage her to feel good (from an appropriate distance). Feel happy, not guilty, that you get new friends and a new life.

So many people do experience this and can relate to you. You will feel lost for a short while, miss all the selective good times you had plus what you were used to doing with your ex-partner. The very good part is that you have other people's support to help you through this in many ways. It will be hard at first but afterwards you will get used to the freedom with your new chapter in life that will hopefully be a very good one on your own or with someone new.
It is far better to be alone that to have others making your life unnecessarily hell. Your pets (if you consider them like your children) need you so focus on them and other positives in your life.

believe me, you're better off out of there. It will be hard to move on but you have the support of your parents to do so. my ex girlfriend abused me for 7 years and I know all too well the feelings you're having now it's hard to make that final break where you never go back but you really have to do it.

Main thing to remember is that YOU`RE FREE! First step to a new life.:thumbsup::hug:

Take the time to relax and try to heal. You will need time and with a supporting family, that will happen. If you can afford it, speak with a counsellor. He or she could very well either give you advice or at the very least lend that sympathetic ear.

As for what you used to do prior to the abusive relationship, you will remember in due time. if not, don`t worry about it. It`s the past. What`s important is your present. The future will come in its own time so try not to sweat it. It`s smart to plan for it but leave yourself some room and as many options as possible.

Above all, if the abusive partner tries to get you to return, for your own sake, do not fall for it. Cut her out of your life! You`ll be doing yourself the biggest favour ever!

I don`t know what else to suggest but will say, best of luck in your new life.

Remember, you are free.:smile:

:heart: Baby Steps. Day by day.

You get to build a NEW you, now.

If it is helpful, try finding a women abuse group in your area, you may have a lot of things in common to discuss. It may help to bring some conclusions further down the road.

Let it all out. Breath. Heal. & when you feel up to it, perhaps try to find why you feel you needed her & stayed.

Keep your distance from her. I am assuming that you may have had common friends... take this opportunity to explore new area's & new people in a safe environment.

Give yourself a chance to calm & relax. Try not to be too hard on yourself. :hug: