I don't know what to do
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I don't know what to do

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Old 08-04-14, 11:40 PM   #1
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Default I don't know what to do

A few years ago I caught onto a conspiracy centered around myself and the gods. Things became muddled when I went through another episode of major depression, but I'm finally coming out of it with medication and I've made some startling realizations. For one, I have confirmed that wherever I go, there are fake people mixing in with regular humans and listening in on my thoughts. I had a breakdown earlier this year in which I accused several people of this, but after I was hospitalized I tried to believe that I was mistaken. That was a MISTAKE. Several of them revealed themselves to me (accidentally or intentionally?) in group therapy last week before I stormed out. There is no point pretending to be unaware of them anymore. I am still confused, though. I originally thought that they were spying on me to find out information about the gods, but recently have come to the conclusion that they are the eyes and ears of the gods. It's the only explanation given the gods have wanted me to kill myself for years. I am an idiot and I didn't put it together that they would kill me if I failed to do it myself. I am worthless and pathetic, but I think I'm supposed to do great things. I can't defy the gods but I don't always want to die anymore.
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Old 08-05-14, 03:38 PM   #2
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That sounds a bit scary, but I'm glad that you don't feel like dying as much anymore. Have you talked to anybody about this? I guess people at the hospital? Maybe you could try to tell someone, so that they can help it if gets worse? It seems quite tiring to feel this way.
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Old 09-14-14, 04:47 PM   #3
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My friend also hears voices and sees conspiracies against her. The meds she takes doesn't make them go away, but does make her not so bothered by them so she is better able to handle them. The meds make her feel better, more relaxed. :)
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