Don't Feel Safe Talking
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Don't Feel Safe Talking

This is a discussion on Don't Feel Safe Talking within the Other Challenges forums, part of the Life's Other Challenges category; Can I give people the silent treatment?...

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Old 12-01-18, 02:30 AM   #1
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Can I give people the silent treatment?
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Old 12-02-18, 07:08 AM   #2
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Silence is often an option because we feel anxious,threatened,or insecure..
i was once in a situation at work where a chief got angry at me because i made a mistake..he told me things and i felt like cooking inside of anger...there were words i could have said in return because the mistake i made was not entirely my fault...at last minute i decided to bite my tongue and say nothing...i remained silent...and my anger ebbed away...i am a dude who speaks his mind and if one is like that then it becomes difiicult to shut up and remain silent....i found this on the net about silence as a coping mechanism==

SILENCE is power

i bet power can always be abused, the effective use of silence can bestow many gifts, chief among them:

The ability to listen effectively,few do it well,most of us engage in listening only as a way of waiting until it's our turn to speak,if you can't resist thinking about what you want to say when listening,focus instead specifically on being silent.You'll be surprised how much your ability to concentrate will improve.and if you can stop focusing on what you want to say when listening (don't worry; it won't go anywhere you can't find it)and instead concentrate entirely on what's being said to you,then silence won't just bring you a new skill; it will bring you new knowledge,remember that listening is far more powerful than speaking. You learn nothing by saying something (which by definition you already know)besides,how often are we really able to influence another's behavior or beliefs by what we say?
A clear view into the hearts of others,silence gets you out of the way and creates a space others will fill in with themselves,a person's personality becomes apparent in mere hours to days,assessing a person's character,on the other hand,takes months to years,but people remain themselves at every moment,an offhand comment made when you first meet someone may,in retrospect,be obviously representative of a large character defect (or virtue)If you employ silence to listen carefully to not only what people say but how they say it,you'll find they'll give themselves away to you constantly and enable you to understand their character far sooner than you would be able to otherwise,years of practice interacting with and observing nuances in our fellow human beings' expression and tone has made our intuition far more accurate than we often believe,it only requires your silence to give full play to its power...

Attractiveness==People want more than anything to be heard and understood and will find anyone who provides them that feeling powerfully charismatic.

Self-control==think how much more in control you'd not only appear but actually be if your first response upon hearing or seeing something that sparks a strong reaction in you wasn't to lash out emotionally but instead to become–silent,silence is a terrific substitute for self-control, not only creating its appearance, but over time and with practice its substance as well...


Wisdom==When facing a new challenge, making silence your first response gives you a chance to reflect before you speak, increasing the likelihood that what you say and do will be on target, intelligent, and useful.,further,silent reflection promotes the appropriate use of what we call in medicine a "tincture of time." If you resist the urge to leap into action at the first moment a problem arises, the problem often fixes itself,in medicine, as in life, sometimes the wisest action is none at all...

P.S..to the OP i wanna say this==remain silent whenever you wish to,nobody can force you to speak...if the voices you hear are an obstacle every time you speak,just remain in recluse and only speak to people which are worthwhile speaking to...
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Old 12-03-18, 02:24 PM   #3
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Are you being silent because you have nothing to say, or because you want to punish someone?
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Old 12-07-18, 07:20 AM   #4
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Neither. I don't want to talk to people because talking triggers the voices and people don't appreciate what I have to say because it's true and "negative" which makes me come off as a b*tch.

I figure I might be seen as a b*tch regardless of what I do so I might as well do whatever I want.

What do you think?
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Old 12-11-18, 11:40 AM   #5
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Neither. I don't want to talk to people because talking triggers the voices and people don't appreciate what I have to say because it's true and "negative" which makes me come off as a b*tch.

I figure I might be seen as a b*tch regardless of what I do so I might as well do whatever I want.

What do you think?
But is it "true" in the black/white sense, or just "true" to you? I do relate to what you're saying and feel very much the same at times. If I get stuck in a negative thinking cycle, this is one thing I start to do and think. For me, I just accept people may think and see the world different than me, and that's okay. I will just choose to not spend time with them if it drives me insane and "triggers" me. I'm too old for that BS :)
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Old 12-16-18, 04:14 AM   #6
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Definitely, you should permit yourself to have quiet days, when your head requires it.
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