I really hate credit cards. Years ago before I had any I thought they would be great. But now seeing as how I have three I can tell you they are terrible for the most part. No matter how much I pay on my credit cards I can never keep up. By the time the end of the month gets here my credit cards are maxed out all over again. I can never get them payed down. It probably wouldn't be as bad if it weren't for the high interest rates I get charged. I always told my mother (and this was before I had any credit cards of my own) that I don't see how people put such small things like a sandwich from McDonald's on their credit card and here I am doing the same exact thing. I never thought I would. I'm actually being charged way more for a snadwich using a credit card than I would if I paid for the sandwich with cash. But that's just it. I seldom have any actual cash seeing as how I get disability due to my severe depression and the little money I get is gone just as soon as I get it becuase I have tons of bills. You wouldn't even think so considering I live with my mom. But I have three credit cards, a car payment, car insurance, an bill for all my online shopping, plus I give my mom money every month for a loan she gave me a while back. By the time the end of the month gets here it's not unusual for me to have nothing or next to nothing in my bank account.
I believe this fianancial burden is taking a toll on me emotionally too. I shop online all the time buying things I really don't need like perfume but I love perfume and it makes me happy but the big bill doesn't make me happy yet I feel I can't stop sometimes. I never thought I would get addicted to antyhing seeing as how I never had a alcohol problem or a drug problem or any other kind of addiction. But online shopping is getting to be addicting. I even had to skip paying my mom this month because I have been shopping so much and trying to keep up with it all and I feel a little bit guilty about it. I do live with her but don't really give her money other than the $50 each month to help pay down the loan she gave me for my car. Most months I do pay her though with the exception of this one. I would have been able to give her the $50 if it wasn't for this stupid flat tire I got recently that I had to pay for. That made me so mad because I would have been able to give her the money if it wasn't for that.
And that's another thing that kills me. I only had my car for three years and this September it will be four years and I always seem to get flat tires. This last flat tire is probably the 5th flat tire in three years that I had to fix. I can't afford to keep fixing flat tires. And I hate taking my car in the repair shop because these assholes think because I am a woman they can screw me over and they always tell me there's more wrong with my car than there actually is. I double checked with one of the extreme few honest mechanics who happens to have a decent reputation for not trying to scam women and he even told me there's nothing wrong with my car when these other assholes swear up and down I need to have this and that fixed immediately.
And now to make matters worse my check engine light came on a week or so ago and will not go off. I don't have the money to take my car to the mechanic to have them charge me just to look at it. These mechanics have the nerve to charge $100 just to diagnose my car to find out what is wrong with it. They don't even do no actual work. They have a device that plugs into a car and can diagnose whatever happens to be wrong with the car. They should not be charging for that. They should only charge for actual parts and labor. They shouldn't charge to do a simple test that takes all of about 5 minutes. I don't know what to do. I have had mechanics scam me before telling me things need to be fixed immediately and a few years down the road I didn't fix them and my car still worked fine. I think scamming people this way should be illegal. It's expensive enough to fix car repairs and they tell you you need to fix things immediately and nine times out of ten you probably don't. I noticed my oil gauge isn't moving at all and maybe that could have caused my check engine light to come on. I don't know for sure. That's a problem I probably wouldn't need to fix right away since I have a thing that tells me when my oil is low anyway. I googled causes that can cause a check engine light to come on and stay on and sometimes the problem can be something very simple like a gas cap not being tight enough. I know for a fact this isn't the case. Oh how I wish this was all it was. But I don't want to not take my car in at all because if there is something wrong with it the problem will only get worst if it's not fixed. I'm tired of having so many problems.