It's so unfair
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It's so unfair

This is a discussion on It's so unfair within the Male Issues forums, part of the Life's Other Challenges category; Maybe this topic belongs in the venting section, idk. Today I heard a bunch of hot girls at my college ...

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Old 06-28-16, 03:49 AM   #1
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Default It's so unfair

Maybe this topic belongs in the venting section, idk. Today I heard a bunch of hot girls at my college talking about sexual stuff and it made me feel like crap. It bothers me how pretty much every attractive female is already taken, has tons of sexual experience, or both. If by some miracle I got a chance at getting into a relationship, I would probably turn the opportunity down based on that alone. It's just so off-putting and upsetting. I wish I lived in a society where the majority of women didn't act like whores. Are there any attractive women in my age bracket who haven't been fucked a million times already? I hate the fact that I'll be stuck with leftovers if I ever decide to "play the game." Shit is so unfair. Some days I really wish I didn't have a sex drive.
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Old 07-04-16, 01:43 PM   #2
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omg just kill me.
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Old 07-07-16, 07:13 AM   #3
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Fortunately not every other female on the planet are like those "hot college girls" you speak of. I don't remember what age group you are, but the majority of women do not act like whores. In some countries and cultures doing so would mean being ostracised and shamed or even sentenced to death.

I have known plenty of women who are very attractive and aren't the type to sleep around. However they are also not the type to get picked up at a bar or club either.
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Old 07-07-16, 06:29 PM   #4
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Fortunately not every other female on the planet are like those "hot college girls" you speak of. I don't remember what age group you are, but the majority of women do not act like whores. In some countries and cultures doing so would mean being ostracised and shamed or even sentenced to death.

I have known plenty of women who are very attractive and aren't the type to sleep around. However they are also not the type to get picked up at a bar or club either.
yeah, I meant the majority of women in the society I am a part of. I don't know if it's any different in other parts of the world. But if it is, I doubt it'll last, considering how much influence western culture has on the rest of the planet.

I'm in my 20s. I've never encountered an attractive female over the age of 16 who hasn't already had a sexual partner.

I'm not sure why you mentioned the part about bars/clubs... I guess you're assuming that I'm looking for love in the wrong places or something. That isn't the case. But I will say that girls who go to those places have just as high expectations/standards as the types who don't sleep around. And I would also add that many of the guys in my family are happily married to club rats.
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Old 07-07-16, 09:09 PM   #5
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I'm in my 20s. I've never encountered an attractive female over the age of 16 who hasn't already had a sexual partner.
Well I met my wife when I was 20 and before that I had dated several girls in their late teens, probably half of whom were sexually inexperienced.
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Old 07-07-16, 10:10 PM   #6
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I'm not sure why you mentioned the part about bars/clubs... I guess you're assuming that I'm looking for love in the wrong places or something. That isn't the case. But I will say that girls who go to those places have just as high expectations/standards as the types who don't sleep around. And I would also add that many of the guys in my family are happily married to club rats.
Please forgive any assumptions I may have made. Can you share exactly what sort of relationship it is you are looking for? And maybe what it is you are looking for in a partner, what you find attractive etc? Hopefully someone will be able to offer practical advice, relevent to your situation, without going by assumptions.
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Old 07-12-16, 03:24 PM   #7
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im not sure what it is that you are looking for in a partner but it sounds to me like looks are at the number one spot on your priority list, and second on that list is that they have never seen other men.... thats just what i got from your text anyway.

if that is the case, id suggest talking to ALL women and getting to know them as a friend first. you never know what you will find attractive beyond looks until you get to know the person first.
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Old 07-12-16, 11:57 PM   #8
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im not sure what it is that you are looking for in a partner but it sounds to me like looks are at the number one spot on your priority list, and second on that list is that they have never seen other men.... thats just what i got from your text anyway.

if that is the case, id suggest talking to ALL women and getting to know them as a friend first. you never know what you will find attractive beyond looks until you get to know the person first.
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Um yeah, looks are kinda important to me. I'm pretty sure that's normal. It's not like I'm talking about supermodels here... I just couldn't be with someone I'm not physically attracted to. I don't see how that's unreasonable.

Tbh I don't know if I actually want a relationship or just someone to fuck around with at this point. I don't really understand why people are always on this relationship BS anyway. It sounds like a whole lot of work for such little payoff. Time, money, energy, freedom... The costs seem to outweigh the benefits. I also imagine that I'd get bored of my partner pretty quick based on my experiences with people in general.

I can't seem to really connect with anyone on a personal level to begin with. I don't have friends and can't make any. I can't talk to 1 girl, much less ALL of them. It's been this way since I started high school. I'm paralyzed by this thing called social anxiety disorder. I just feel so empty all the time.

Last edited by Black Sheep; 07-13-16 at 12:00 AM.
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Old 07-13-16, 12:03 AM   #9
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Well I met my wife when I was 20 and before that I had dated several girls in their late teens, probably half of whom were sexually inexperienced.
I think times have changed man, haha. Things are really different from back in your day. I fucking hate my generation.

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Please forgive any assumptions I may have made.
it's all good. I was just clarifying. I'm not really out there trying to pick up or anything. I don't participate in the game because I know it's rigged for guys like me to lose every time.

Last edited by Black Sheep; 07-13-16 at 12:06 AM.
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Old 07-18-16, 08:38 AM   #10
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I hope I don't come across as being that ancient lol. I'm still in my mid 30s!

I found it nerve racking approaching girls when I was younger so I did try different ways such as online, friends would set me up on blind dates or I would get to know girls as friends first before asking them out. I'm sure a lot of guys get nervous when it comes to dating, others probably try to hide it or mask it with Dutch Courage. The game isn't easy for a lot of guys, but it does have its rewards and many find that they have a lot of fun along the way.

You sound like a decent guy and I'm sure you would treat a woman extremely well. I have to say I agree with mmch85 in that it would be better to get to know them as friends first. I don't mean friendzoning, just getting to know their background before taking it to another level. If you want someone who hasn't slept around, it will be easier to find out first by the way they talk about past relationships etc.

I won't pretend to know how social anxiety feels but it is my understanding that it would make communication with others in social situations extremely difficult. I have bipolar and general anxiety so totally different diagnoses to what you are experiencing.Relationships all have to have communication before they can form, so this is the biggest obstacle. I can't remember if you recieve treatment for this, if so could you talk to your therapist about alternatives if it's not working? Does your college campus have counsellors you can talk to? Maybe you could start another thread on this forum asking for fellow sufferers to share their thoughts or suggestions for managing the anxiety. Just a thought.
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