i was talking to my sister today about how excited i was about going over to see him, and she looked at me and says "i think ur onli smiling bc ur happy about the fact that u have a bf. i think ur onli happy bc someone loves u and that ur not really happy with how things r" i said "well, no im not. i dont like the distance between me and andy, but thats y im going, then hes going to come here, then im going bk to there". and then she went to sex whcih completely caught me off guard!
but its just, she said the same thing to me in high school, when i was 16 and i dated a 23 yr old. and hse was right, i was onli with him bc i liked the attention he gave me. but this is different! or atleast i think it is.y would she say that to me! she knows how i am! and now i have a bunch of nerves to back up her thoery! but i no this isnt like carsten (the 23 yr old). im more grown up, more confident, i love myself more then i did when i was 16, trust in myeslf more. now, id be happy with or without him. true i wouldnt be this happy, but i would still be happy, and confident, and everything else. idk, now im getting second thoughts about our hole relationship, and its stupid! its not the fact that i have a bf that makes me smile and happy, its the fact im happy with him. idk how to explain it i guess. but im n love iwth him and he loves me, all that matters, right? so y am i here overthinking about it then? if thats the case, then y cant i just simply say to myself "no, shes wrong, let it go"