Getting close
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Getting close

This is a discussion on Getting close within the Love and Relationships forums, part of the Life's Other Challenges category; All my life I have neer had any one to come close with I try to be myself but myself ...

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Old 07-21-06, 11:30 PM   #1
 
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Default Getting close

All my life I have neer had any one to come close with I try to be myself but myself just isnt good enought I dont know the problem I ready to commit to some one It that know one wants to know me.
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Old 07-21-06, 11:33 PM   #2
 
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im sry that your sad, but hmm this is werid sense i know you...hehe patric who are you talking about?
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Old 07-21-06, 11:34 PM   #3
 
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maybe people dont open up because you wont let them...do you find it hard to interact with poeple?
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Old 07-28-06, 09:27 PM   #4
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hun ur good enough for me u know u can tell me anything.
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Old 07-30-06, 10:04 AM   #5
 
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As with many other characteristics and thoughts revealed by usernames, titles, messages and signatures, this one also "sounds just like me."

I've been alone so long I cannot remember being any other way. Had friends--sort of--in college but that was decades and several locations ago. No friends here and now--literally, except for work and occasional waves to neighbors don't interact with anyone except son (rarely, one-syllable answers unless he wants something). Marriage ended 10 years ago--completely rational decision for her, I understand now--and nothing since. Given that there are no normal relations, I've concluded problem is me, not them.

I don't know what to tell you as I clearly have not figured this out myself--and personality/suspiciousness/nerves probably mean I won't get too far before the end, anyway. Best I can say is that you are not alone--maybe others will be have some useful ideas.
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Old 07-30-06, 01:31 PM   #6
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No, you're definately not alone. I had alot of friends now I have maybe 1 or 2 and they don't even live here; everyone else I meet is just a casual interaction that goes nowhere. It seems to get harder and harder to make friends the older I get. When I see that other people have lots of friends or just friends, period, I have to wonder Is it me? and it probably is; I don't trust people the way I used to because I've been burned so many times and I think that's the problem--you have to trust people to be friends. Once people get into the workaday world most of their time is spent climbing the ladder, trying to make money, be no. 1, have nice things, compete with the jones' and live comfortably and they're willing to trade alot of integrity, deceny and friendship for that. I think most adults have mostly superficial, work related friendships and very few real ones.

Maybe you have to learn to trust but also look the other way.
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Old 07-30-06, 08:58 PM   #7
 
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Well, you guessed it....I'm in that boat with you all. I can honestly say that in my 29 short years of life, I have only had one real boyfriend. You see, my problem is that I usually end up rushing things (because I want it to work out so bad) and I end up running the guy off. I also have some serious trust issues. In my world, a man is guilty until proven innocent. I know this is wrong and because of all this I will probably end up alone, but its not something I can just turn on and off. Don't get me wrong, I have dated men before and things go well, but Bam!! I get too clingy, needy, whatever, and they run off. I can't offer any advice to you, but I can say I am here if you need to talk.

May I ask how old you are?
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Old 07-30-06, 09:00 PM   #8
 
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Old 07-30-06, 09:10 PM   #9
 
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Hang in there kiddo. You're young. Give life a chance.
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Old 07-30-06, 09:23 PM   #10
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Hardtosmile, just so you know, and this is the truth: there are men who want a genuine, trusting relationship and believe in being a gentelman and integrity--not that many, but they're around. You have to give 'em a chance though. And, incidentally, men need a fair amount of space and don't like to be rushed that way.
A woman friend of mine said that if it dosen't click right away, it's pointless, whereas I was of the mindset, you have to give it a chance, get to know the person sometimes. Her's was the view that you can fall in love at first sight, but I think that happens more for women than men.
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"The greater the sensibility, the greater the suffering...much suffering." Leonardo da Vinci.

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