I am starting to lose interest in men. To me they're just dick. I enjoy sex but I think I can live without it.
Meanwhile when I see women I'm memorized by their beauty. I have huge crushes on women. My heart flutters. I feel like a teenager.
I feel like women are much more relationship-oriented than men whereas men are much more sexually-oriented. I hate how men want to have their cake and eat it too. Women are ok with just being in relationships whereas men are wired to go gallivanting and then magically fall in love. There is too much discomfort attached to my relationships with men. I would feel horrified with being in the wifey role and find out my man was with someone in the whore role whereas if a woman cheated on me I would feel like it was just a mistake.
I have several concerns with pursuing a relationship with a woman:
-My mom hates the fact that I'm bi and would never approve of this. She would hit the roof.
-I feel like I'm too fat to be attractive to a woman right now and need to be skinny first. This is a minor concern as I plan to lose all the weight by Thanksgiving.
-I don't have a job.
-I suck at oral sex. I don't feel aroused by it like I do when I'm masturbating and looking at images of lesbians. Sex is an important part of a relationship.
-I'm bisexual and most women want lesbians because they fear you will leave them for a man. But maybe I'm a lesbian who has sex with men, as I don't think I'm capable of falling in love with a man.
-I have a lot of baggage. I have been with a A LOT of guys. I was a stripper, flirted with prostitution. Of course the person doesn't have to know this.
I'm kinda tired of being single now...