Want to pursue a lesbian relationship
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Want to pursue a lesbian relationship

This is a discussion on Want to pursue a lesbian relationship within the LGBT forums, part of the Life's Other Challenges category; I am starting to lose interest in men. To me they're just dick. I enjoy sex but I think I ...

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Old 07-05-13, 11:48 PM   #1
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I am starting to lose interest in men. To me they're just dick. I enjoy sex but I think I can live without it.

Meanwhile when I see women I'm memorized by their beauty. I have huge crushes on women. My heart flutters. I feel like a teenager.

I feel like women are much more relationship-oriented than men whereas men are much more sexually-oriented. I hate how men want to have their cake and eat it too. Women are ok with just being in relationships whereas men are wired to go gallivanting and then magically fall in love. There is too much discomfort attached to my relationships with men. I would feel horrified with being in the wifey role and find out my man was with someone in the whore role whereas if a woman cheated on me I would feel like it was just a mistake.

I have several concerns with pursuing a relationship with a woman:

-My mom hates the fact that I'm bi and would never approve of this. She would hit the roof.

-I feel like I'm too fat to be attractive to a woman right now and need to be skinny first. This is a minor concern as I plan to lose all the weight by Thanksgiving.

-I don't have a job.

-I suck at oral sex. I don't feel aroused by it like I do when I'm masturbating and looking at images of lesbians. Sex is an important part of a relationship.

-I'm bisexual and most women want lesbians because they fear you will leave them for a man. But maybe I'm a lesbian who has sex with men, as I don't think I'm capable of falling in love with a man.

-I have a lot of baggage. I have been with a A LOT of guys. I was a stripper, flirted with prostitution. Of course the person doesn't have to know this.

I'm kinda tired of being single now...
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Old 09-12-13, 06:33 PM   #2
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Hi there. :)

I think it's great that you are able to talk about this here... It can be hard to talk about these things... (I know I'm not good at it.. lol).. I'm sorry that you feel like you're not attractive to other women. I don't think that's true. People are all different, and like different things. What may be attractive to you, might not be to another. So I don't think you need to worry about how you look. I'm lesbian myself, and I like all kinds of women. :) I've also been in relationships with bisexual women.

I also don't think you need to be perfect at oral sex to be in a relationship with a woman. You don't need to like everything and you don't need to do anything that you don't feel comfortable doing. The main thing to consider if just if you feel attracted to the woman, and if you want to commit to a relationship. Have you been flirting with women or had sexual encounters? Maybe "testing" these feelings out could help you?

I would not recommend getting into a relationship just because you want to be in a relationship, though. I've been in relationships which were not good mainly because the two of us did not have equal feelings for each other. If you do enter a relationship that you're unsure about, try to be honest with her so that she knows what she's getting into. I know that some of my friends have been burnt because the woman getting into the relationship were "experimenting" and not really interested seriously. I'm not saying that you would, though.

Anyway.. The best of luck! Women are fantastic, and if you do get in a relationship with a woman, you're lucky.
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Old 10-20-13, 10:39 AM   #3
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Sorry I just noticed this! Thank you so much! You've made me feel a lot better.
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Old 10-24-13, 07:57 PM   #4
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You're welcome.
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Old 11-25-13, 11:28 PM   #5
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Hey SensualGirl, i saw you post on another thread. have you ever dated a transguy? perhaps you would find it intriguing/interesting dating someone ftm (female to male). if you're traditionally attracted to someone masculine, maybe you can find a transguy with a senstive emotional side to him that he's not afraid to express. he may also be relationship and sexually-oriented! ooo, best of both worlds!
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