I am 13 and coming out for the first time.
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I am 13 and coming out for the first time.

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Old 01-05-09, 02:48 PM   #1
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Question I am 13 and coming out for the first time.

Well i want to start by saying a big thx to silent cry as u helped me the most to get thru my depression. Now, i am gay, it feels a relief to say it. I am going thru a lot of problems right now due to this. Most of which r related to the fact that i hav been hanging out with girls a lot more often. Also i hav been having a lot of comments aimed at me Bcoz of how i hav only been with a girl once when i was 10. This was wen i was not aware of my sexuality. And the fact i havent kissed a girl or abything due to this. Sometimes wen i get really angry at these comments i just want to scream, "im gay alright!" Bcoz thats the reason 4 it. But i wont come out to any1 Bcoz of the homophobic attitudes so many ppl i know hav. If i was to come out to any1, it wud be this gurl i kno cuz she even asked me once but i culdnt tell if she was serious or not and i didnt hav the curage. I still dont but the more i think bout it the more i think she was being serious. She asked me at lunch wen she another girl i amfriends with and i had came in early to class to get a hedstart on the work. Anyway i just need some words of advice and to kno that ppl care i guess.
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Old 01-05-09, 02:53 PM   #2
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I also want to add that it has been really hard for me as i keep getting crushes on boys on my classes and i cant do anything about it.
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Old 01-05-09, 03:06 PM   #3
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aww,
good to see you back her btw. im glad u are finally coming out.. im sorry u are finding it tough tho... forget what ppl say ...they dont matter.. be true to yourself... you will find someone you can be with soon enough



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im the kinda girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
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Old 01-05-09, 03:25 PM   #4
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Thx for that i thot u might send a reply. I just find it so hard to be myself wen every1 seems so anti gay. I just dont know wat to do cuz things can only get worse as then ill just be older and not kissed a girl or w/e comments theyll hav for ne then
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Old 01-05-09, 03:25 PM   #5
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You seem really certain about your sexuality A999. My daughter is gay and I support her fully. She's 18 now and I can tell you when she was round your age and speaking about being gay, I found it difficult to take her seriously. That was my fault because I didn't recognize it was possible to be so certain about your identity at that age. I tolerated it to a degree and basically told her she would 'get over it' because it was just a phase. I may have hurt her feelings in the process.

I am blessed that she has always been able to talk to me about this and we work through things. I only want her to be happy and develop relationships which will find her settled and content (presuming that is what all people want in life!)

I'm telling you this because it might help you understand the viewpoint of a parent and where they stand. Even without sexual identity matters, at age 13 you may find it difficult to get your parents to consider you a young adult over anything - even down to taking control of the tv remote! Adolescence is a transitional period between childhood and adulthood but it is a time for letting go for parents - that's why everything becomes polarised in the household. Both parties have issues to contend with.

I really wish you luck A999. keep posting on TTL
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Old 01-05-09, 03:30 PM   #6
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I am pretty certain tho i can remem havin gay thots wen i was younger like wen i was eight and as such i agree with wat ppl say about being born gay.
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Old 01-05-09, 03:32 PM   #7
 
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Good for you.....no body should be afraid of who they are. I have alot of gay friends and let me just say that they are the best friends that I ever had. I even some what of a father figure that was gay and he was the greatest. Do not be afraid to take your time in letting people know. It is your call
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Old 01-05-09, 03:42 PM   #8
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I just want to thank everyone who has replied as it has made me feel a lot better about who i am. It will help me put up with the problems i am facing so thanks again.
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Old 01-05-09, 03:49 PM   #9
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when ur a bit older, hopefully they will have more sense and understand it and you better so they wont make comments like that. ur friends will always be there beside you.. and anyone that has a problem with you really isnt worth ur time



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im the kinda girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
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Old 01-06-09, 09:08 AM   #10
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Anon,

As someone who has been there before and as someone who knows that every case is different, it really does help to have an ally or two in the battlefield that is school. A while after I started High School, when I was about 14, I realised that I was gay and that I was crushing for a guy in my classes. It was hard for me to be around him without picturing the two of us together in a crowd or together alone, most of the time it was alone and it got even harder when we had to do a project in Human Biology about the human reproductive system. Oh Irony, how it burns.

So after countless hours together, alone and with it being close to the end of school, about 35deg C in a classroom with no A/C, we were not wearing much. Then after a while of in-visioning him naked and staring at his crotch, he noticed that I was...."At Attention" talked to me about it and I told him everything. He was nice about it. He didn't judge me for it and we we're friends afterwards.

A few months later, one of his "Yeah, Boy!" crew saw me in the City with my first boyfriend, who luckily didn't go to my school. Then the next day when i rocked up, I had everyone in the school calling me a Faggot, Aids Fucker, Queer, Shit Stabber, all those generic, idiotic names. When I was walking home from school, I met up with the rest of the "Yeah, Boy!"'s and got beaten with a steel pipe, tied up with a bike lock, spat on, pissed on and had rocks thrown at my head.

Crush came along and saw what was happening and took a crowbar that was about to be the next thing to hit me, and bashed the original "Yeah, Boy!" over the chest. He told them to back off and the rest of them did. I don't know what happened to him. I've lost contact with everyone that I knew there. Being the First "Fag" at a Catholic School kinda makes your friends lose your number.

The moral of this, if there is one, is that High School is hell for everyone. You get beat down (Metophorically) all the time. All you have to do is get back up. Once you graduate, you never have to see any of those people again. All the people I know that were successful in High School are now speed addicts, teen parents, in jail or all three. There is light at the end of the High School Tunnel, no matter how dark it gets.

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