Undeserving
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Undeserving

This is a discussion on Undeserving within the Introductions forums, part of the Forum Announcements category; Hello, I ruined the life of the most important person in the world to me. I spent time trying to ...

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Old 01-21-18, 09:01 PM   #1
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Default Undeserving

Hello, I ruined the life of the most important person in the world to me.

I spent time trying to forgive myself and do the best I could, only to discover that I was just ruining other people's lives because I had become focused on myself again, and I couldn't let go of the thought that maybe I could still get the train I derailed back on track.

I hate myself sincerely once again. While I have been interested in suicide for many years, if I did I would really ruin everything for everybody else on so many levels. I don't deserve to be consoled, but I'm in a very confused place. Its unfair to burden people I know and I definitely can't talk to the person whose life I wrecked. That's why I'm here I guess.
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Old 01-22-18, 08:35 AM   #2
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Welcome Zilch

Whether you believe you derserve to be consoled or not, here at least you can find support, and of course you definitely deserve to be heard.

Share your story, you might be surprised at how others see things, it's good to have somewhere to be open about all.
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Do not listen to a word I say
Just listen to what I can keep silent
The only way to gain approval
Is by exploiting the very thing that cheapens me
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Old 01-22-18, 07:45 PM   #3
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Hey Zilch welcome.
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Even if our scars donít match thereís no wrong you canít make better if you can figure out a way to change your mind.

And sure thereís things I regret not doing or doing. Those thoughts climb my spine like spiders, and then Iím really the stranger in my own bed,

and that ball of nervous gets pushed into every crack. Thatís whatís holding the bricks together.


- Listener
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