(tl;dr short version on the bottom)
Sometimes the hardest thing to see is whats right in front of our noses, I know it's cliche but it wouldn't be overused if it didn't ring true. I've been outcast, bullied and threatened as a kid, turned into a teenage bully, now I'm 20 and the results are coming in, I've failed most of life's tests.
I stopped believing I was a smart kid. I stopped thinking I should be a good guy. I fell into the trap of becoming a bully in order to not be bullied. I stopped caring when I should have cared the most. I didn't study hard enough. I didn't show respect and in fair turn received none.
Somewhere along the line I've chosen each time to do the wrong thing. It didn't happen all at once. It's not like I woke up one day and was like "hey I think I'll turn into a dick because no one wants to be my friend and I get picked on every day". It was hard for me growing up. My parents didn't help me with school, my siblings weren't allowed to help me with bullies, the school couldn't do anything about the bullies and I was too small to defend myself. Slowly I just chose to eat instead of be eaten, bully instead of being bullied.
Name calling, throwing stuff, stealing, trouble starting, being disrespectful at every turn. More than one chip on my shoulder.
Now I'm struggling to get my fail filled transcript and average ACT score so I can get into a community college. When I get there I'm going to struggle to learn how to be a good student and be a good guy again. I don't have many friends or good stories. I deserve it honestly and I'm not asking for pity, I'm rightfully ashamed of myself.
My inspiring point is to never give up. If you are a nice smart possibly nerdy kid, don't change, ever. Use bullying as fuel for your fervent studying and expression. Don't compromise your morals and world view because of a bully. Express yourself and educate yourself. Don't be afraid to ask for help with school, or bullies or making friends.
If you're a bully, it's never too late to turn around, as long as you are honest and work to change. If you're a person who see's that lonely kid getting bullied, for pete's sake just help out! Being bullied and getting no help is horrible, especially when you're just a kid. Even if you just see a lonely awkward kid, keep trying to be friends, it makes a world of difference.
Thanks for reading if you have, I hope it means something to at least one person.