Originally Posted by tigerlover

@floating..we all know your true friend went away too young..and this leaves often a trauma in us when we lose closed ones like this in that way..therapy helps you of course...but it's only a plaster on a wound noboby can heal..not even a therapist...this is a personal issue...i do not know too much about the condition sarcoidosis...but i know about alcoholism since my dad was an alchoholic who went to tremens delirum etc...he died at age 76 without a liver diagnosis at all..since he smoked heavily he died of lung cancer..your friend did not die at all about the condition alcoholism..it was another mishap on medical diagnosis,prognosis etc..? i don't know?nobody can tell..we want you to be at peace with yourself and be able to say to yourself==i honour my friend==pity he died too soon,but if death comes around and takes away people unexpectedly...what can we do exept from grief and despair?we honour the person he was in life and just feel that force within yourself..so come on..he's not gone..he lives further in your mind and soul...we all love your honesty here to express your true feelings..not so easy,you know...take care...and keep posting...greetings and support from all of us on TTL..take care...

Originally Posted by FloatingDreams

I still just can't believe he's gone. I get that sinking feeling whenever I get a call on Skype from a different friend, and I realize it can't be him.

Originally Posted by FloatingDreams

It is still so hard. I miss him so very much. I have never lost anyone before except my father who had terminal cancer, and that was 20 years ago. This grief just seems to go on and on. I am seeing a counsellor and keep hoping this will get easier.

Originally Posted by FloatingDreams

My friend died at 36...

Every day I see elderly and/or decrepit people and I think, why? Why do they get to live and my friend had to die? I can't help thinking this.

Originally Posted by DPG1

I've asked that question too. My Dad didn't see his 48th birthday. When I worked as a security guard, I've had to deal with elderly people who are complete assholes and I know they can very well be the ones who will die alone and not be mourned or missed. That in itself is the true death there. Gone and forgotten.

Your friend on the other hand, while he was young, is missed and mourned. He will be remembered and in one way, that can be a small consolation. Maybe not physically but in memory, he's still alive. There's a poem called "The Dash" by Linda Ellis. While your friend's dash was short, it sounds like it was quite full courtesy of the friends he had (you included) despite the challenges he faced in life.

I hope this helps you.