I have been attending a number of support groups to deal with the feelings of grief I have about my former relationship. While the person I'm grieving is still alive, I'm very much aware that the feelings I've had is from the process of grieving.
Last night I attended a Grief Support Group and will be attending another tonight *I HIGHLY recommend others doing this*.
One of the concepts I heard was that, like an object, grief takes up a certain amount of space in our lives. We must give grief the room to occupy us in the way it will. Wow.
This was a very intriguing concept to me. It gave me an even more intriguing idea:
If my Grief were an object or a being separate from myself, what would it look like?
Well for me it changes, somedays it is small but menacing. It's like a pet that keeps close to me. It bites me and climbs on me. I must take care of it. On the days it is small it is black, furry... somewhat like a creature from the movie "Critters" only it's smaller and is only mouth, eyes, and teeth.
Then that creature changes somedays. Other times it has full facial expression, it mimics my sorrow, it mocks my pain. It makes me turn on myself.
Somedays its face looks like the painting "The Scream".
It grows when left unattended. It becomes bigger and scaly. It's demonic, armored and impenetrable. It lays in bed with me, most times on top of me. It crushes me.
All versions of these grief monsters wake me from my sleep. But when the big one wakes me, it completely incapacitates me.
It has been helpful for me to visualize my grief and the many forms it comes in. Perhaps this could be helpful to some of you.
What does your grief look like? What form does it take?