Broken and in need of advice
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Broken and in need of advice

This is a discussion on Broken and in need of advice within the Grieving forums, part of the Life's Other Challenges category; My story, my brother who I was very close to committed suicide five years ago. This was very difficult and ...

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Old 06-08-11, 11:52 PM   #1
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My story, my brother who I was very close to committed suicide five years ago. This was very difficult and not understanding my own grief I began to struggle elsewhere in my life. I lost my relationship of 8 years and most of my friends. Sense then I have rebuilt but struggle everyday. My mother has since become very ill and will not be with me very much longer and I am struggling with this greatly. As a result I am withdrawn and struggling. I am single and would love to start a family but I have such a fear or being hurt or having to endure more loss that I push people away that take an interest. I need to figure out how to cope with the loss of my brother and the future loss of my mother so I can move on and be happy. I am so tired of crying and feeling the weight on my chest. God help me.
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Old 06-09-11, 07:29 AM   #2
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So sorry for your loss and your pain. It sounds like you really need to talk to somebody, a therapist or a pastor who is trained in counseling, or someone....to help you work through all of this. Do you have someone you could talk to?
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Old 06-23-11, 07:10 PM   #3
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Sun bear,

I am so very sorry for your loss. I have lost both my parents due to depression/cancer. I have two brothers. They are everything to me... EVERYTHING. While losing my parents was very difficult and near impossible to overcome for me, losing my brothers? I just can't imagine it. They are my heart and my soul. I applaud how far you've come. You are a strong person. You have to tell yourself that it's often times the first step to recovering. I'm very sorry to hear about your mother. My advice would be to take things one step at a time. Understanding our grief is a large part of overcoming it. Maybe some therapy or talking to someone who will unconditionally listen to you will help you. As you said your mother doesn't have too much time. Spend what time she does have left with her. Read with her. Watch movies. Talk. Love. Do all the things you can with her before it's too late. Starting a family is a great thought and I do believe it will happen for you. But one thing at a time slow & steady.

If you would like to talk...I am here :)
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Old 06-25-11, 05:47 PM   #4
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I'm so sorry.

It sounds like it would be helpful to talk about your brother's death with someone, because it is making it hard for you to move on.

If you don't have anyone who is close to you and your Mom, it would be helpful to find someone who can work through this with you. If you have a pastor, I know they would be more than willing to be there with and for you. If not, try to find someone, a friend, counselor, or a group of some kind.

If your Mom isn't on Hospice, you can still call them and they can tell you who you can speak with. If she is on Hospice, let them know YOU need help and why. They have resources to help.

I care ...
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