Ever since I got myself into the Harry Potter series by watching a movie marathon on TV, I have found that my obsessive thoughts have gone. Or at least, they aren't about the guy I liked. Even if they have switched their focus to the Harry Potter series, they at least are not distressing because they aren't about a real person who I have the ability to talk to every day. And so, since these thoughts are gone, I have found that I'm no longer suicidal because I don't really want my thoughts to go away. I love Harry Potter, and I want to keep loving it. I didn't want to love that guy. Also, my self harming has been happening much less frequently. Even if I'm not completely through with it, I think I'm getting there.
With the help of the new medication I'm on, high grades, newly-found independence, and Harry Potter, I think I can end this year on the right note, even if the first 10 months were absolute hell.