i don't know what's wrong with me...
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i don't know what's wrong with me...

This is a discussion on i don't know what's wrong with me... within the Female Issues forums, part of the Life's Other Challenges category; i just got home from work. i'm bawling my eyes out, and i'm not sure i can pinpoint why. i ...

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Old 10-29-13, 11:57 PM   #1
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i just got home from work. i'm bawling my eyes out, and i'm not sure i can pinpoint why. i feel very alone at this moment. more so than normal for me. i'm a mentor at work. i have trained numerous employees on a rigorous training schedule that takes around 4 months. my current trainee has made great progress and shows a lot of potential. i find out today that as soon as his training cycle is over, he plans to transfer out of the department because of me. i'm mean. i snapped at him one day, and now he's planning to leave because of me. wtf? really? going to transfer from our department because of me? i'm mean? grow a set of balls and quit crying you stupid little girl. we work in a high stress, fast paced, demanding environment. you are going to get eaten alive if you think I am mean. i don't spend 4 months training someone who continues to need his hand held. for fuck sake.... dude you are 31 years old!! AND my best friend hasn't called me in weeks because she is mad that i'm buying a house and she (in her own little world) planned to retire, buy a house and she and i would live together. not my plan. i am not gay, she is. we have been friends for 7 years, and now she decides i crushed her dream? scuze the hell out of me, i am as straight as they come, love men and men's companionship, etc. i don't know what she's pissed at because she is well aware of my preference. big reality check for her or something? AND so i AM buying this house, i close this week, and i guess it's a lot more pressure on me than i thought. AND cherry on the sundae, i snapped at a vendor at work. oh, yeah, and the sprinkles on top is menopause.. i have no patience for stupid people, i have no patience for those who seem to be unable to apply common sense to their task at work, i am exhausted with all this.
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Old 10-30-13, 02:53 AM   #2
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To me you just sound stressed out right now. Maybe take a little break from it all. I'm hearing stressful job, stressful employee and stressful personal life. Stress is all I'm hearing. Maybe your pushing yourself too far right now. I'm not sure, but I'm guessing.
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Old 10-30-13, 10:34 AM   #3
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thanks.... i know. i am off this friday and for the next whole week and 2 weekends. if i can just make it through the next 2 days without imploding, exploding or melting down i will be able to focus on something else.
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Old 10-30-13, 10:41 AM   #4
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Hang in There! Maybe try to go for a massage also or something. I think you need this break.
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Old 12-03-13, 02:12 AM   #5
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I hope your break went well. I'm a bit late on this one, are you feeling better?

You can't take the soft and winey adults to heart. I'm not in your level of stress work but we have babies at my job too. One new guy who I gave some kind of "figure it out for yourself" response to when he was being trained by someone else and I didn't have time to help him, later told me I was "mean." Later that same day I gave him a hand written sheet with all the codes and numeric information he needs for the whole hospital system we work with, a nice thing to have to get started better then how I recall being started. Despite this, when I pointed out that he had been given a special sheet by me to help him, which I haven't done for others, he still maintained I'm mean. Some people are too sensitive and need to realize that being taught at the convenience of others is something to get when you can, you may be told it is inconvenient, even told that YOU are a problem for asking. That's a truth about life in the working world. Try not to feel badly that the childish adult you trained felt you were mean. I agree, he's got a rude awakening to face. You sound like you do a wonderful job and it's just stress.

Is moving into your new home going well?
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