When I was a teenager (right up until I was about 20), I was so fit and toned and looked great. The funny thing is that I never realised this at the time..I actually thought I was fat! Up until I was 17 I weighed 52kg, and up until I was 20 I weighed 58kg. I've always been quite muscley for a female too from playing softball and keeping active.
Then I moved out of home and started eating worse and didn't get as much exercise since starting fulltime work. I packed on the kg. Now at 26, I'm 10kg heavier now than I was when I was 20. This may not sound like too much.... but it is a lot for someone who has always been small, especially considering my height (5'2).
I hate being at the gym and looking into the mirror. I hate how all of my clothes are getting tight on me again. I hate looking at myself in photos. I won't even let people take photos of me because I hate how fat I feel now. I feel so fat next to my bf, who is very fit and has a 6 pack. I'm sick of getting paranoid over the fact that he would prefer a slim, fit girl (like all of his friends gfs) and that he will leave me for someone like that. I want to be toned and slim. I've had enough of being depressed about this.
I've tried numerous diets...milkshake diets, Jenny Craig (don't know if that's only in Australia..but it's a meal program), Weight Watchers (calorie counting)... and while they have worked in the short term, it's been hard to maintain the weight loss. I need to stay on a strict, regulated program or else I'll just fall back into my old ways.
The other day I was watching this show (it's my bf's fave show) which is all about working out and stuff. And each year they have a body transformation competition - the results of those in the top 10 was just jaw dropping. So I decided that I'm going to do it. It's free as long as I blog about it on their website and use their supplements. I think the blogging part will be really good motivation for me.
So I've got my Body Transformation Guidebook now, which explains how gaining weight and weight loss works, how our body works, what foods I should eat and should stay away from, etc. And I'm really excited about it. I'll be on a high protein, low carbohydrate diet, along with drinking their protein shakes and going to the gym daily. It's my goal to make it into the top 10 for next year... this may be too ambitious, but why not reach for the stars.