So I guess none of my fears really matter and my lack of confidence in myself may be justified.
Just four days in a job I hated I was fired, mid afternoon....just after my lunch break. Came back to the office to find out that the head accountant discussed her lack of confidence in my capabilities to do the job and suggested that the position would be too stressful for me.
I knew something was up since upon my return from my lunch break the atmosphere changed. People who talked or laughed with me just the previous day now would avoid eye contact or any acknowledgment of my existence.
Of course I shouldn't care but it has shattered my confidence even more.
It's even harder since I suffer with chronic anxiety and atm am currently taking no medication. Usually Paroxetine (Paxil) was my medication but after long time use it brought on hangover like headaches. Now I'm trying to exist a few days medication free until I can try Lexapro to manage my anxiety.
Soooooo tired of being scared of everything. General anxiety sucks the big one and it's no way to live. It makes you want to stop trying at all.
All of my family members, 6 in total have chosen to cut me out of their lives and my friend of 7 years has recently also chosen to abandon our friendship. I feel so alone and just plain scared.
You guys are all I have and I don't know if anyone on this site even cares.