Eating disorder help ?? (Male)
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Eating disorder help ?? (Male)

This is a discussion on Eating disorder help ?? (Male) within the Eating Disorders forums, part of the Mental and Physical Health category; I really hate talking about my problems because of how weight and appearance obsessions are "girl problems" or "homo problems", ...

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Old 01-02-16, 03:43 PM   #1
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Angry Eating disorder help ?? (Male)

I really hate talking about my problems because of how weight and appearance obsessions are "girl problems" or "homo problems", and it forces me to quiet down about everything.

I have not had a diagnosis, but I think I may need help. Not sure what you wanna call it, but I'm almost always occupied with my obsession over losing weight. I have always been overweight my entire life, but never really was bullied (but have been). My problems with self-esteem started in 5th where I started to doubt myself and kinda "shrink back" because I was afraid of messing up. Over the summer, I started feeling shame over my body, and I avoided swimming, and began to cut out certain foods. It got to the point where I was fasting for a week or two weeks. Then I thought that I wanted to be a normal person who could eat like everybody else, and that I wanted to end this fasting. I would eat, and sometimes overeat because I'm so f*****g hungry, and would vomit because of the shame, and spend the rest of the day exercising and drinking way too much water.

Fast-forward to now, in high school, I was calling this a phase. But over the years until now, ive been through several periods of excessive fasting, restricting, and shame and end up purging when I wanna retreat back to normal. But here I am, and these problems are back, and more severe. When I purged, I never done it more than one or twice a week. No this is like five or six times a week, then I spend a week or two weeks fasting, and I'm never satisfied with the weight I drop. The difference now is that my obsession is starting to interfere with my social life. I try to avoid talking about food, avoid social events that might involve food, and I am not eating with my family at normal times, and this is all affecting my emotions as well, nothing like last times. It's been a month or two, and I can't stop and something in me doesn't wanna stop, but I know I need to.

I don't know how to label this: anorexia or bulimia, which confuses me.
But worse, I don't know how to ask for help. My mom, I have a feeling, may scoff at me for a minute but will understand (after all, I think she had an eating disorder at my age), but my dad on the other hand is very homophobic and will consider me gay if I have any touch of women's problems. He's noticed my weight drop several times, but I only tell him it's from exercise.

So where do I begin to ask for help? How do I address this to both of my parents. And it would help if you were male (but nothing wrong with a woman helping me), and could you share your story and how you got help from your parents?
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Old 01-03-16, 04:56 AM   #2
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First of all congratulations for admitting you have a problem and trying to do something about it.

In terms of your parents if you really feel that your dad will not be supportive but your mum has been through this then it may be something you want to share with your mum alone. Admitting these things out loud to somebody will be a huge weight off your chest, you don't even realize how much so until you finally give a voice to these thoughts and share them with someone and your mum may have invaluable support on how she got through it.

The long periods of fasting plus the purging could have very damaging long term effects on your health not to mention you have already admitted that this is effecting your social life in a massive way and therefore your mental health and well-being.

This kind of thing really needs professional guidance, the doctors would be confidential so your parents or your dad would not know about it if you wanted to keep it that way but you really need to be strong enough to go and talk to someone. If you continue to keep this to yourself and go on as you are things will not change and will only get worse so you need to decide whether this is how you want to live. Just being on here you are already looking for help but you need to take that next step and speak with a professional who can suggest ways to help you change these habits.

The sooner you do the better you will feel!
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Old 01-07-16, 10:48 PM   #3
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I ended up deciding that I wouldn't talk, and my problem only got worse.

First when I wrote these post, I felt more in control of my eating. I could suppress my temptation when I wanted. Now, I'm beginning to break the fast much earlier than I anticipate, which leads to more purging.

But...I weigh myself every morning. My mom found the scale (initially hers) under my bed, and took it away. I took back and hid it once more.

She also found my "sick" cups, where I shove vomit and pieces of food when avoiding meals.

Right now, she hasn't exactly spoken to me about anything of the sort...surely if you found vomit in a cup, you're likely to ask questions? Do I need to still confess or do you think she's figured it out?
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Old 01-08-16, 08:17 AM   #4
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Take the initiative my friend and speak to her
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