I tell my parents about my depression but 😕... (need advice plz)
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I tell my parents about my depression but 😕... (need advice plz)

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Old 04-20-20, 11:57 AM   #1
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Default I tell my parents about my depression but 😕... (need advice plz)

Well, hello. I think I need to confess quickly myself (not really quickly buuut 😅) and I need some advice or idk.

Okay so, it's been a while since I've been able to say to myself, "You ARE depressed and you ARE having suicidal thoughts. You NEED help."

Because before, I helped a friend of mine who was suicidal and depressed to get out of it. (Now she's happy and has a great boyfriend she can count on.) And considering what she was going through, I couldn't tell myself that I too was depressed. I thought I didn't deserve help, and that everything would get better. (well, guess what? It's not)
So I've been giving up on my studies for a while now, and I can't do anything. And confinement doesn't help much, you know ?
So friends of mine who are doing their best to support me, advised me to tell my parents. Because they were there, and anyway I had some confidence in my parents. And I knew they were going to help me.
(Well, I guess I was a little wrong...)

I slipped a letter under their doors, which explained (without dramatizing) that I couldn't keep up with my studies, and that my depression was maybe one of the causes.
And so my mother came to give me a hug, to comfort me. And when I insisted that I didn't want to worry her, she told me that she wasn't worried. That she's going to do whatever she needs to do to help me with my studies.
And about my depression (which she didn't really mention) she told me "that it was nothing, that it happens to everybody to feel not so good from time to time. There are times like that... She also cried when she was young without knowing why and didn't feel very well."

So I guess she blamed it on being young and stressed out about school.

And today (we're on holiday here in France, it's the last day) I decided to go ahead with my homework that I hadn't finished during the holidays. And I had a hard time doing them.
She said, "Just because you're okay now, because we talked to the school... doesn't mean you don't have to work."

And I'm not fine now, just because we talked about school together, doesn't mean I'm fine again.
I don't think she took me seriously.
I don't think she takes depression seriously in general. She often says when the whole family's been on the couch for a while and not talking to each other that "Wow, we're all depressed, haha."

I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm sick of this situation and I want to find a way to get better, but if even my parents don't take me seriously... idk

Thanks for reading all this ��
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Old 04-20-20, 06:23 PM   #2
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HiI'mWhy~ First of all, welcome to TTL!

Now, getting down to the real matter at hand; depression & your parent's. First of all, while it's good that your mother did understand that you are feeling depressed, I don't think she truly grasped the 'depth' of your depression. Some of it's due to you not explaining (more further in depth) to her exactly how you're feeling & the depths of what you're feeling. My own daughter, many year's ago, didn't know how to admit nor approach me with her feeling's of depression. That led her to being an emotional rollercoaster & it got to the point where she wanted her life end. It's difficult to "force" someone else, that doesn't understand how deeply the depression is, to help you; help yourself. However, that's what you are doing, at least right now. You're reaching out for help, because you feel that no one understands. WE DO! That's right, we do here at TTL understand the "shapes & forms" that depression takes. You've done the best thing for yourself, your life & to keep moving forward with thing's by seeking help/support/suggestions/ideas & it keeps going.
First of all, maybe starting to keep a journal, being able to express yourself freely (you can do that here, there's a place for it) is also a suggestion that comes to mind. It helps, truly, at least for myself, being able to off load thing's that I'm feeling, experiencing or going through & being able to be open/honest & write them down. To me, personally, it's like taking baby steps towards a healthier & happier me. Thing's that make you happier & not think about so much, is also another suggestion. You can walk in a park, by yourself, or IF you have a dog, you can walk your dog. Being 'caged up' right now, isn't helpful, but it's keeping you & other's you love safe at this point. You like music? You can do thing's that make you "lose yourself" & make you a bit happier, all while trying to work through your depression.

We can get through this; together!
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow. ~ Mary Anne Radmacher

Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one. ~ Bruce Lee

That which does not kill us makes us stronger. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche
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