Depression driving me to be a monk - please advice
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Depression driving me to be a monk - please advice

This is a discussion on Depression driving me to be a monk - please advice within the Depression forums, part of the Depression Forums category; I am 32 years old with chronic depression. This depression is at the height of its power and does not ...

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Old 04-04-16, 07:14 AM   #1
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Default Depression driving me to be a monk - please advice

I am 32 years old with chronic depression. This depression is at the height of its power and does not let me do basic things. I can't wash clothes, get dressed or work a day job. I am jobless. I want to die but I dont have enough courage to attempt suicide. Instead I have an option to live a life of a monk. I have a mother who is 62 years old and healthy. If I am not there she can live with that. I have tried it before and it worked. So I want to know what you people think about my decision. Should I leave everything and live a life of a monk? Will it be justified to my mother? Please answer this. It is very important.
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Old 04-04-16, 10:17 AM   #2
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Sounds wonderful. How long would you do it for?
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Old 04-05-16, 09:04 AM   #3
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I am planning to do it permanently. Will it be justified to my mother as I will leave her on her own. She has got money to live with.
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Old 04-06-16, 05:00 PM   #4
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I'm afraid I can't tell you if being a monk is the right choice for you or not. I think the only person who knows would be you and God. This much I think I know on the topic of monks. Those who pursue it usually do so because they feel called to, because they want to. They feel it is their purpose. I don't get that from your writing. I think you're hurt and you see it as your only option.

How about this though - instead of living as a monk, maybe you need to get away? Read some self help or inspirational books, find something you love, something you're passionate about.
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Old 04-07-16, 02:28 AM   #5
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I dont know what to tell you either. But its a highly drastic desision. Its not an easy life being a monk there are many challenges. But it could be ideal despite that and you could eventualy find inner peace. I would say you cant truely know ahead of time its a leap into the unknown. There would be a supportive community around you and you could make lifelong connections with other monks in the monestry. And get spiritual guidance as well. But i would say why not think some more on it. And i would agree going away somewhere to reflect on it alot would be benifical. Give you perspective.

I thought i might want to become a buddhist nun for a long time and i think i would if i werent so physicaly ill. But thats because i believe in buddhism so much not cos im trying to escape something. Dont they give you a novice status to start with so you can try it out for a few years before you are fully accepted?
Your mum im sure would miss you terrably. But just think about mother terresa she went into a convent very young and did so much good with her life. She had a mother but had a true calling in life.
Do you feel like your called to be a monk or is it just to escape the world?

Sometimes we have to do drastic things to save ourselves. And those we love have to pay the price as well as us with guilt that we caused pain for them.

Its a very hard decision. Its different than what i was going to do cos my only family is my dad and he could have come and visited and stayed in the monestary. Im assuming its a christian monk your meaning. The buddhist are generaly more relaxed and alow time to visit your family and time off if your family are having difficulties and need you.

Good luck with deciding follow what your heart says not your head. Its a tough decision either way.
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Old 04-07-16, 03:55 AM   #6
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Thanks for your replies !
I dont feel 'called to'. It is just a pure escape from the world. Because I dont feel I belong to this world. There is nothing left for me here. All of my situation is a mess and its something that I can not get along with.
I have two options. Either join the community of monks and leave my mother on her own. Or wait for my mother to pass away and then join the monestery. These are two practical options that I have. And I think I will go with the second option.
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Old 04-08-16, 12:14 AM   #7
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I was going to say that to you you could wait for her to pass away. This is probaly what i would do myself. If my mum where around still and i still wanted to be a nun. I would have waited. You dont have to feel a calling. To be honest i think you would find alot of the other monks came there to escape the world too. It doesnt mean you cant be happy there.
Yes your mum could need you alot as she gets older it would be so sad to leave her alone.
But mean time you could go on lots of christian retreats. Ive been to many for weeks at a time and they are welcome breaks from the normal world. They are often part of a monestary and sometimes you can eat with the monks or nuns. And go to their chapel for prayers with them.
Good luck. still keep posting here.
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Old 04-13-16, 07:50 AM   #8
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Thanks lilly

I think your suggestion works best. I should probably wait for my mother to pass away before living a life of a monk. My mother probably will be alive for more 10 years. I pray that I get the strentgh and patience to wait for that long. Lets see what happens.
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Old 04-13-16, 10:21 AM   #9
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I feel I don't belong here too. But that's too drastic. Why do you feel you don't belong here?
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Old 04-14-16, 07:32 AM   #10
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I dont feel I belong here because I am not catching up with the world and wordly things. I am living life of 10 years back. I live in old age. I am not at all techno-savvy. I just dont belong here.
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