Confused about Bipolar disorder?? Help. xx
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Confused about Bipolar disorder?? Help. xx

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Old 08-29-11, 07:22 AM   #1
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Default Confused about Bipolar disorder?? Help. xx

I am so confused at the moment. I don't think that I have Bipolar, I have just noticed that I seem to act / feel similar to people who do.

My moods have always gone up and down an awful lot, I very rarely seem to just feel normal, most of the time I am very severely depressed, extremely sad etc, and then occasionally I am very happy. When I am happy I am pretty buzzing really, I make so many plans and I think I am capable or a lot and just kind of want to acheive so much. I know that they are kind of similar symptoms to that of someone with Bipolar, I am sure that I am fine and I am just depressed but I am just worried, I don't want to say anything to anyone I know.

The other thing that has made me think about this is how obsessive I am, Iv suspected I suffered ocd since I have known what it was, its pretty obvious, but I am too embarassed to talk about that too :L.

Could anyone help me, I feel a bit lost. x
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Old 08-29-11, 10:36 AM   #2
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Hi wmf,

I've done the same thing. I knew about my depression when I was like 20-ish, but I had no idea I had bp for at least 10 more years. I didn't know that my hypomania was abnormal. I felt normal - I felt good when I was like that.. I'm known to have lots of energy sometimes + bouncing all over the place, making my friends smile bemusedly.. + yeah, when it's bad, making crazy plans that when I'm not like that I see I can't do nearly so easily.. So many unfinished projects from things that I began with so much excitement.. before I didn't have the energy/interest anymore..
Have you talked to your doc about this? It's important.
Bipolar's ok when treated. I go up and down and in between, but I take Lamictal which works pretty well at keeping me somewhere in the middle.
You should talk to your doc about this.
Are you taking antidepressants?
If so, you should talk to your doc asap bc antidepressants can possibly make bp worse. Someone with bipolar disorder should be on mood stabilizers before antidepressants are added.
((((((hug))))))))
I know it's scary, finding something that may be "wrong" - though it may not, also, as you said.. reading up on the subject and talking to a professional can help put your mind at ease a bit.
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Old 08-29-11, 04:09 PM   #3
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Hi wmf,

I've done the same thing. I knew about my depression when I was like 20-ish, but I had no idea I had bp for at least 10 more years. I didn't know that my hypomania was abnormal. I felt normal - I felt good when I was like that.. I'm known to have lots of energy sometimes + bouncing all over the place, making my friends smile bemusedly.. + yeah, when it's bad, making crazy plans that when I'm not like that I see I can't do nearly so easily.. So many unfinished projects from things that I began with so much excitement.. before I didn't have the energy/interest anymore..
Have you talked to your doc about this? It's important.
Bipolar's ok when treated. I go up and down and in between, but I take Lamictal which works pretty well at keeping me somewhere in the middle.
You should talk to your doc about this.
Are you taking antidepressants?
If so, you should talk to your doc asap bc antidepressants can possibly make bp worse. Someone with bipolar disorder should be on mood stabilizers before antidepressants are added.
((((((hug))))))))
I know it's scary, finding something that may be "wrong" - though it may not, also, as you said.. reading up on the subject and talking to a professional can help put your mind at ease a bit.
Its just so confusing, I am 16 now, I have been depressed on and off for almost two years now, getting progressively worse. Now I come to really think about it I guess before all this started, I was never as happy as I am now when I have good days. I just get really energetic, always want to be doing something, making plans and trying to acheive big things, which like you said, always seem to end up half finished as when I am depressed, I'm gone, totally not interested in anything I was while I was happy.

I have been to my doctor about depression, a woman I know took me, I am starting counselling for it soon but I havn't been put on any medication due to age.

I don't like thinking about this and I keep telling myself I'm thinking rubbish and I am fine, its just playing on my mind a bit.

Thank you :) xxxx
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Old 08-29-11, 05:00 PM   #4
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Diagnoses are interesting aren't they. Clinicians and doctors have given me varying diagnoses. For me, I know that I suffer from depression and have had many major depressive episodes. When my symptoms have somewhat gotten better (not gone away) I bring myself to be more confident, feel better about myself, etc., I feel "happier." I hope what I am about to say makes sense but my normal feels ten times better than my baseline. My baseline would be the depressed state I feel on a constant basis so when the bar is raised to a normal mood, it feels like a jolt, but not a manic jolt if that makes sense. Bottom line, is that diagnoses are confusing and controversial. I always come to the conclusion and question of "Do I have a problem with my mood?" Yes, therefore, to me, diagnoses is relative.

I do empathize with your issue as I know what it feels like to have a mood disorder. Take care! :)
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Old 08-29-11, 05:22 PM   #5
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Diagnoses are interesting aren't they. Clinicians and doctors have given me varying diagnoses. For me, I know that I suffer from depression and have had many major depressive episodes. When my symptoms have somewhat gotten better (not gone away) I bring myself to be more confident, feel better about myself, etc., I feel "happier." I hope what I am about to say makes sense but my normal feels ten times better than my baseline. My baseline would be the depressed state I feel on a constant basis so when the bar is raised to a normal mood, it feels like a jolt, but not a manic jolt if that makes sense. Bottom line, is that diagnoses are confusing and controversial. I always come to the conclusion and question of "Do I have a problem with my mood?" Yes, therefore, to me, diagnoses is relative.

I do empathize with your issue as I know what it feels like to have a mood disorder. Take care! :)
Its just so agrivating I don't understand why I feel like this an when I am happy I feel very happy and I love it, I just sometimes, occasionally don't quite know if its right, I dunno, I'm sure it is, I'm just lost. Thanks for your reply, I do understand that, its horrible and I hate being depressed. xx
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Old 08-29-11, 05:24 PM   #6
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Hi,

I am manic-depressive and have only been properly diagnosed during the last 2 years or so. Just for reference I am 28 and I have a history of mood swings since I was about 13. The point being that it can take a while, especially considering when your up you think everything is good, that is of course, until you crash again. You may want to start keeping a mood diary just in case. You really should talk to someone about it. I wish I did earlier. If you can't do the med thing, try exercising and eating right and write your feelings down. You may not notice a pattern, but when you write things down and look back at it patterns generally become apparent. I tried to deny it for a long time, but after I destroyed relationships and got into drugs, etc. There comes a time where you really have to take a closer look at things. Also, what helped me determine if I needed professional help was asking myself if I make excuses for either why I feel up or down. Too many excuses may signal something. Good Luck.
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Old 08-29-11, 05:39 PM   #7
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Hi,

I am manic-depressive and have only been properly diagnosed during the last 2 years or so. Just for reference I am 28 and I have a history of mood swings since I was about 13. The point being that it can take a while, especially considering when your up you think everything is good, that is of course, until you crash again. You may want to start keeping a mood diary just in case. You really should talk to someone about it. I wish I did earlier. If you can't do the med thing, try exercising and eating right and write your feelings down. You may not notice a pattern, but when you write things down and look back at it patterns generally become apparent. I tried to deny it for a long time, but after I destroyed relationships and got into drugs, etc. There comes a time where you really have to take a closer look at things. Also, what helped me determine if I needed professional help was asking myself if I make excuses for either why I feel up or down. Too many excuses may signal something. Good Luck.
Yeah, I think me being happy on that odd occasion put off me seeing a doctor about being depressed for a good year :/, I just don't understand anymore, I want to be ok but I am so confused I don't think I should feel like this. I don't know what to say if I did go and see a doctor about this, and I don't want to end up being told theres something wrong thats never gonna go away and that I'll be this way forever, its so frightening. x
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Old 08-30-11, 08:49 AM   #8
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It's very frightening...I was the same way, but the funny thing is that when I was finally diagnosed I felt relieved. Finally I knew what was going on and that it is manageable. It's not easy and taking meds won't make everything just disappear, but it becomes more manageable. Just be honest with the doctor - remember they aren't mind readers. At least you'll know one way or the other and can deal with it then.
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Old 08-30-11, 08:55 AM   #9
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It's very frightening...I was the same way, but the funny thing is that when I was finally diagnosed I felt relieved. Finally I knew what was going on and that it is manageable. It's not easy and taking meds won't make everything just disappear, but it becomes more manageable. Just be honest with the doctor - remember they aren't mind readers. At least you'll know one way or the other and can deal with it then.
But I just don't know what to say to them, I don't want to go back and talk to them again, for so long Iv been doing the, just ignore it and act like its not there thing, its getting kinda hard now so I guess I have to :/ ... thank you xxxx
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Old 08-31-11, 02:18 PM   #10
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The not talking thing doesn't seem to be working anymore. Maybe you should try something different. Talk about how you feel, what your worries are, etc. You could even write a letter before hand and give it to them when you get there; break the ice. :)
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