hola a todos!
i started volunteering in a shop last week, once a week. i went in for my second day today. and I don't know. i keep worrying about how i come across. the other people there, in cluding the manager dont really seem that talkative, and they didnt ask me anything about where i was from, if i studied etc. normal ice breaker things . so i didnt really say anything either, becuase i dont like bothering people if they dont want to talk. Also i dont see the point in doing small talk if they want to be left alone. so i kept to msyelf mostly, unless they asked me something, or i said a few things during my 3 hour shift but not much. they didnt seem to want to engage much - or so i thought
who knows, maybe i read everyone wrong. also i get a real 'ghetto' feel in the shop :/ reason being everyone who worked there kept telling each other to fuck off. they were joking, but it was just a bit rough for me. also at the end of my shift last week, the manager was talking to someone else and she mentioned 5 pints of blood....but hey idk , maybe she was just talking about her latest blood transfusion
. sotoday when i went in one of the guys who worked there gave me a really creepy vibe, so i kept quiet around him because i actually didnt want to talk to him. there was a french girl there on placement and i chatted to her until she was finished her shift. then i pretty much kept quiet when i was working. sure the manager didnt make any convo with me, except for one time when i accidently answered a question she was asking someone else. :/ it just seemed like they didnt really make an effort to talk :/ i did talk sometimes. but i dont like annoying people, so if i dont feel like they are chatty, i wont talk
. i worry i might have come across a bit timid :( because even tho i did talk, soemtimes i was very quiet, but then i saw that creepy guy being realy quiet too and mumbling. so i figured why not. i dont know. i jsut keep thinking of one time when i asked the manager if i could go on break (polite so i am), and that creepy guy stared at me, and i mworried it was becuase i was so quiet
... but then when i sad some things to him he didnt really answer back either.. so idk. oh idk. i have a feeling my priorities are all wrong... im more worried about whether ppl like me or think im shy as opposed ot how ghetto and rough some of these people seem to be . blah. but im so worried. i hate coming across as a lil frightened rabbit or someting :( even , if i did, i dotn think i did all the time. oh idk. but it was only m ysecond time working there, and some people dont like it when u cut across their conversations when they all kneow each other. so i took out m yphone during my break because i didnt want to be prying
(<---- like that). i actually feel scared to go back next week because theres a different manager then and shes actually rougher than the one today, at least the one today made an effort to talk sometimes. the other one... oh i dont know. but then im scard to go in and thell them i dont want to volunteer anymore :( god im scared of everything lol