Something that just happened.
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Something that just happened.

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Old 04-04-10, 02:42 PM   #1
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Okay, I've been diagnosed with social anxiety (among other stuff...) just couple weeks ago. I knew I was like that before of course, but it's official now.

It's gotten alot worse than I thought, let me tell you what just happened.

I'm living with my mother temporarily again since I had to move out of my apartment from other city to get treatment here (to depression mainly). I'm sitting at my computer in my room, watching youtube videos and stuff. Just killing time. My mother popped into my room and said that she'll go to a pub nearby with her friend. I said okay. They leave and my older sister comes here and asks where mom has gone. I say to the pub. She said that she'll be going too and I should join em. I say no. (never been there, literally zero interest in that place and people in it). She says okay.

She calls her cellphone and turns out she invited our familyfriend who lives closeby to try talk me into going to the pub (she was going there too...). I tell her that I don't want to go. Then she keeps on asking, on and on and on and says stuff like "When you were younger you were such a nice and lively kid, what happened?" I'm getting really anxious now and am only shaking my head. Then she triest different tactic "Maby he's afraid of all the girls coming on to her in there, my god what a handsome man he has grown." This is all just absolute rubbish and I know it, she must know it, and I get really frustrated and feel like I should say something to her but I just can't get a word out. My forehead started to sweat just from the anxiety. At this point she says "Okay, if you're not coming with us today, you're coming with us the next time. Promise?" I shook my head, I don't want to make false promises because I know for a fact that I will never go with them. Then she started all over again and I couldn't take it anymore. I said yes I'll go next time just to get her out of there.

They left and I realized I was damn well near having a complete panic attack just because they asked me to go to the pub. That's not normal.
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Old 04-04-10, 11:14 PM   #2
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It seems that you were getting anxious not so much over the idea of going to the pub, but from resisting going. What would happen if you didn't resist going? What if you actually went - You said that you were "just killing time".

I use to have a lot of panic attacks in social situations, but I found that it doesn't get better by avoiding them. It's hard and you have to push yourself a little but eventually it gets easier and then you actually start to enjoy it. This seemed like a safe situation for you to begin to practice being social. I mean you would be surrounded by your family and they obviously care about you. Maybe next time it might be cool if you actually went. Practice makes perfect.
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Old 04-05-10, 06:35 AM   #3
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Guess it would be good practice to be more social. But I really...really...really don't enjoy their company or being in a pub. I just don't like it. Plus it's annoying and awkward because they WILL keep asking me what's the matter with me these days...Guess I could tell them what's going on, but I'm really not close enough to them to be that comfortable. I don't even like them. My mother and father knows about my situation, and sister to some degree. But noone else.
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“Faith is the great cop-out, the great excuse to evade the need to think and evaluate evidence. Faith is belief in spite of, even perhaps because of, the lack of evidence."
~Richard Dawkins


"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
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Old 04-05-10, 07:46 AM   #4
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I think no means no. You're old enough to amke your own decisions about where you want to go and hang out. It's ok if you want to be at home along. I LOVE downtime! lol. I think it's good for all of us to take time to be alone and relax, recharge, whatever you call it. I think your family was just trying to help, but they should have backed off after asking, in my opinion.
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Old 04-05-10, 07:47 AM   #5
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You're not doing it for them. Your doing it for you. Think of it as an experiement. I get that it may be annoying and awkward at first but eventually that will subside. It may be worth a try. What do you have to lose? Also, don't try to predict negative feelings, just feel. Good Luck
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Old 04-05-10, 09:03 AM   #6
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Ash, yeah...that's just all I seem to do now. I remember being different before and I understand how disapointed they are with me being the way I am now.

Tree, I do think you have a good point there. But my view of people has changed so much...I'm not entirely certain is it the truth or is it that the depression makes me always see the worst in them.

I think it's the truth. The reason I am the way I am now is because of...people. Partly even because of THESE people, my family and the friends of the family who wanted me to go with them. I don't like them.
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"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life."
~Winston Churchill

“Faith is the great cop-out, the great excuse to evade the need to think and evaluate evidence. Faith is belief in spite of, even perhaps because of, the lack of evidence."
~Richard Dawkins


"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
~Albert Einstein
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