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This is a discussion on Lost within the Anxiety forums, part of the Mental and Physical Health category; I'm freaking out. I can't stay at my job much longer. I can't relate to happy go lucky people, i.e. ...

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Old 11-02-10, 08:14 PM   #1
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I'm freaking out. I can't stay at my job much longer. I can't relate to happy go lucky people, i.e. my roommates. I don't know how to not have panic attacks when men look at me. I look at myself and all I see is a shell of myself, reduced by trauma and self-hurt. When I look in the mirror, I see a sad stranger. I keep trying to hang on to a dream, but it's slipping away. I feel like I can't overcome myself. I don't belong in this world. I don't want drugs or alcohol. I love reading, nature and respect, helping strangers. I look at people throwing trash on the ground and want to scream. I can't change them, but I won't acquiesce to that level. I need everything to be okay, just for a day, so I could breathe without wanting to collapse. But that day doesn't come.
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Old 11-02-10, 08:32 PM   #2
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hmm you like nature reading and helping strangers you could be a teacher a helper at a food shelf or a scientist step outside you shell and join a club if you cannot connect to your roomates if you live close to your parents try to stay with them your roomates are just not your type of people. when you look at men maybe you could look away or just take a deep breathe hope i helped
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Old 11-03-10, 06:40 AM   #3
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thanks, any help is welcome. i'm in the science field, but i'm working in a part that doesn't work with my moral grounds. i like the part about looking away, that's funny. the problem is i can't step outside of the shell. i am the shell. i have to rebuild myself, but i don't know who i am so i don't know how. i'm been trying to figure out what i still enjoy.
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