I think it's a genuine trait to have, being shy or socially awkward. Really sweet in a sense, but I don't intend anything personal in saying so. I know how frustrating it can be, and I used to feel this way more often than not. It still happens here, mostly when people eventually get to me with praise or affection. That can throw me off on what to expect of myself, or if I should take such influences to heart.
My [possibly odd] view on it is - many folks, myself included, get into the habit of taking situations and people's influence for advantage, or mentally undermining others' status or influence, to avoid feeling nervous and fucking up. This can become an innate habit, i.e. requiring no effort or deliberation, such as when I've often related to pissed off (and sometimes irrational) doctors while thinking and responding rationally.
Taking things for advantage is pretty much the opposite of being genuine, IMO, so I accept that viewpoint even as it relates to these methods of remaining cold and calculating. A lot of folks would no doubt consider this as part of growing up - growing out of shyness and becoming familiar with life's challenges and nuances. Perhaps either I skip steps or just blatantly disagree that coming to take things for advantage is part of growing up. Probably both. Emotional control is surely [literally] needed for growing up and being socially acceptable, so I obviously tend toward denial of social pressure and conformity (while practically playing many of the games and burying the denial).
People are said to get into habits of inattentional blindness
, and it makes for some fun videos and tests online! I know that disregarding stimuli is largely required for human efficiency in high demand situations, so I'm somewhat torn on the general necessity and morality of such things, right in line with the above denial. Surely that's a reason why the "rat race" was never appealing, though it's taken its' toll anyhow with promoting selective memory and other undesirable traits of impatience, while limiting capacity and/or creativity for other areas of life. JME... I guess it's yin and yang in effect.