Tonight, I was in my bedroom, and heard my mother's voice from the dining room yell, "PIZZA!" So, I went out there to get some, as I was feeling pretty hungry. As I'm walking out, my mother is saying to our roommate (thinking I wasn't near enough to overhear) "Hurry up and make your plate, because you know he'll eat whatever is in here." I can't promise that that is an exact quote because I was too enraged when I heard it to remember it exactly. But what she meant was, for everyone to hurry and get what they want before I come out, otherwise I'll eat it all and they wont get any. My mother is nice to my face and disgustingly disrespectful to my back. I don't know why I even trust her anymore. She's the fakest person alive, and acts like she's real.
Anyway, I turned the corner the second she finished that sentence, and she instantly changed her demeanor and said, "Want some pizza?" I was enraged beyond comprehension, but wasn't showing it. I simply said, "No." If she thinks I am a glutton, or a garbage disposal, I am going to turn down her food, because it disgusts me that she sees me that way. I have fasted before, I've made it a whole 7 days before on just water. I can do it again. I'm to the point where I don't even care anymore if it's healthy to fast or not. Thinking of her, and thinking of food makes me so sick to my stomach that I don't feel like eating anymore anyway. I'll lose weight, and if I die from starving myself, I don't really even care. I have nothing to live for.