I've Been Abused
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I've Been Abused

This is a discussion on I've Been Abused within the Abuse forums, part of the Mental and Physical Health category; I've been verbally, emotionally, sexually abused throughout life. I'm traumatized. I'm worried it will happen again in the future. What ...

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Old 02-22-18, 01:51 PM   #1
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I've been verbally, emotionally, sexually abused throughout life. I'm traumatized. I'm worried it will happen again in the future.

What do I do about it?
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Old 02-22-18, 01:53 PM   #2
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I don't know....what do you think?
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Old 02-22-18, 02:13 PM   #3
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Have you seen a therapist for it?
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Old 02-22-18, 03:54 PM   #4
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try to make changes to lessen the chance of it happening again, like maybe, lets say someone doesn't like how you act around them don't be around them, or if your employer doesn't like how you do your job find out how they want it done, if someone verbally abuses you don't allow it to happen, idk just a thought, kind of hard sometimes though.
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Old 02-22-18, 04:49 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by midnightphoenix View Post
Have you seen a therapist for it?
Yes, but she doesn't give advice.
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Old 02-22-18, 04:50 PM   #6
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Quote:
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try to make changes to lessen the chance of it happening again, like maybe, lets say someone doesn't like how you act around them don't be around them, or if your employer doesn't like how you do your job find out how they want it done, if someone verbally abuses you don't allow it to happen, idk just a thought, kind of hard sometimes though.
How do you stop verbal abuse from happening I guess is what I'm wondering?
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Old 02-22-18, 05:33 PM   #7
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yeah that's a hard one, maybe don't give them the ability to get away with it, i figure if they can't do it consequence free they will stop, now what are the consequences I'm not sure
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Old 02-22-18, 05:53 PM   #8
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Difficult topic to discuss because i believe abusers just like the fact they have power over the one they verbally or sexually abuse...it's often about bullying because they wanna show their anger or jealousy towards the abused...verbal abuse is a direct conflict and it's difficult to stop if someone has got a big abusive mouth and uses bad words to depict race,social status,sexual behaviour in deragatory terms or language,a verbal abuser acts often in a rage of anger,anxiety or frustration towards the one he/she abuses,i dislike gossip,name calling,critisism specially when the verbally or emotional abuser knows that he/she got power over his victim,it's their victory mostly...so...i would avoid these kind of people and try to stay away from them at all cost..if a trauma once settles in our brain due to abuse then we must ring the alarm bell and take action,whether it's therapy,examine our anger and anxiety,it's often not that easy..in my opinion a sense of self control should be practised or learned..by refusing to engage with the verbal abuser and refraining from trying to reason and argue with them,you are showing the abuser that he or she is not acting rationally,and that you are not going to put up with that behavior...but if we do that we easily get into a rage of anger...an abuser exactly know how to deal to turn that anger feeling into their favour and it makes if often more painful to bear for the one who feels the abuse...in my eyes abusers,be it verbally,emotionally or sexually are bastards who wanna prove their frustrations towards someone they can control...I spare you some details of abusive behaviour which i saw in my life...if i get verbally abused i usully talk back and i show these fuckers they can't win..well...i lost few ones(ahah)but it did not have any affect on me like trauma,i easily feel guilt though...so to the OP i say==try to avoid situations like surfcaster said,do not get involved in talks if you know the person is gonna use power to drag you into the gutter...sexual abuse like rape etc...is a much deeper trauma for lots of women or people in general..it mostly results in a trauma or a bad feeling...i got 2 friends here in Belgium==a girl got raped in a violent way by an attacker,she hates men,turned lesbian,i know some homosexual boys who got gay bashed in a pub etc...it's something which belongs in the gutter of society really,these kind of people should be in jail..
i call it the scum of the earth...
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Old 02-24-18, 04:27 PM   #9
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Im sorry this happened to you. I think you should learn what you can so it doesnt happen again.

I just started telling my family members that there are consequences to chewing me out and I sentenced them to a penalty of no communication until I get over it. I can go forever without talking to anybody so we'll see how long it lasts. To be completely honest, nobody is perfect and we all slip up and say stuff we shouldnt say. But we should try not to. You can tell when somebody is trying to watch what they say and those that dont give a damn and just spit out all kinds of verbal abuse. But I dont try to change people. I just get away from them. I think that works well for me. Solitude is my friend.
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