The other day, I had the worst day of my life. I had just had a nice couple of days catching up with an old friend. I didn't have enough cash to get on the train, but I had a ticket. I freaked out. I was planning ways to get off the train before I got to town. I saw the ticket person and told him that I had no money, but I was willing to pay for another ticket, and when he said he was going to give me a fine, I almost started crying. I said I would pay for another one. I could feel the stress getting to me. I walked away miserably out of the train station. I tried to negotiate. I said "send me a bill for a ticket. I will pay for it!" The ticket guy told me that he would let me off this time, as I didn't have any cash at all, not even in the bank.
Then I saw someone in the street I didn't want to see. :evil: I recognised him. He had sexually harassed me on the train late at night a few weeks previously, and as he passed me, he recognised me and said "I know you". I replied "no you don't" and he insisted that he did. I told him to leave me alone or I would call security. That increased my anxiety and stress. I almost burst out crying and felt like lashing out at someone, but I didn't. I held it in, breathed in deeply and remained calm. He looked like he wanted to continue trying to talk to me, but he saw me walking the other way and didn't pursue it any further. This guy made me feel so humilated when he harassed me on the train. He made me so angry that I wished I'd had a knife in my bag that night so that I could have threatened him with it, just so that he would leave me alone! I'm not a violent person and wouldn't physically hurt someone deliberately. I prefer to walk (or run) away than fight.
When this guy was harassing me on the train , he was trying to feel me up, but I told him to stop it. he tried to put his hand on my leg, but I said to him very angrily, almost exploding, "Don't do that!" I said it so loud that everyone on the train could hear. He continued to try to harass me in this way, asking me to come back to his place so he could lick me out and give me pleasure, but I told him I didn't want anything, that I was tired and just wanted to go home. He kept on. It made me feel so bad and so humiliated and so angry that I really did want to just punch him in the face or call him a fucktard right there.
I swear to god, that if I ever see him again, I'm going to stick my foot so far up his arse that he won't know what hit him! Why do people always pick on you when you're feeling good, so that you're not ready to react appropriately?
I could kill that fucker. I really could.
I informed the transport board that I was harassed and described what he looked like to them. Maybe something will be done about it. Am I just a wimp? This is making me feel really depressed and a bit unsafe. I think next time I'm going to just scream out "Don't you dare come near me or touch me, you fucking ugly, creepy bastard! You talk to me at all and I will kick your fucking arse!" Lousy fucking bastard! Grrrr!!!!! People suckkk!!!!! I want revenge! Am I wrong to feel this way? What should I do?