Depressed/Suicidal because i am ugly
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Depressed/Suicidal because i am ugly

This is a discussion on Depressed/Suicidal because i am ugly within the Suicide forums, part of the Suicide Forums category; The title says it all! I am 19 year old guy and i am ugly as fuck and this ruined ...

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Old 10-26-16, 01:37 PM   #1
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The title says it all! I am 19 year old guy and i am ugly as fuck and this ruined my whole fucking life! Honestly guys, i have the worst physical appearance that you can ever imagine... i feel terrible about that and i can't do anything about it...so i am destined to suffer in my whole future life as i did until now. I am writing this shit while tears are falling from my eyes...i am sooo depressed and can't live like this anymore... Let me take this from the start.

Firstly, it's a fact that i am ugly...i am not exxagerating or trying to seek any attention or something. I am disgustingly ugly...I am so fucking short, 5’4, with a slim & weak body and I have a small & childlike face, small head, as well as poor eyesight. I literally look like a fucking 10 year old ugly boy. Seriously, I mean it, my eyes are tiny and my nose & mouth the same. Not only I have a small features but also I am very ugly, my face is flat and tiny with horrible structure. I never had a girlfriend and I would never have because I am so fucking short, weak and I look like a fucking kid and have nothing in common with the men that women want. Seriously now, i don't blame girls for that... if i was a girl i wouldn't want to do anything with that little ugly guy nomatter how good his personality is. I really get that!
Don't waste your time telling me all the bullshits about ''you are not that bad'' and that ''appearance is not important, personality matters''. All these are shits! And anyone who believes them is naive and fucking idiot! So shut the fuck up! This is how the society works now! If you are unattractive you can't have the same chances as other people do.
Can't have a girlfriend, can't get the girl you like to feel anything for you, and even i don't go out to have any fun because i am so embarrassed when other people see how ugly i am and i locked myself in my fucking room away from everyone becoming an introvert, while all other people of my age party and enjoy life!
This makes me miserable...depressed...suicidal. I pissed of when i see other people walking happily around because it reminds me that i would never be able to enjoy any similar happiness as they do. I can't look myself in the mirror...when i do i fell down in tears, and feel horrible about my ugliness. I feel so sad that i have no confidence to do anything and feel ashamed. Added to this, i feel even worse when i see myself in pics next to other average and good looking people. I just can't get the life i want because my physical appearance restrict me. This awful...unfair

I personally believe that i wouldn't be depressed if i didn't look that bad...because i like life but i can't enjoy it because of this...and i just can't do anything about it...and this makes me depressed because i only know that i have one life...but still can't find any happiness..
Eventhough i love life I want to end this life, because i am unable to enjoy it as i want because of my ugliness! I don't know if you understand this. But this is how i feel and that makes me so sad and miserable.
I don't know why i continue to live in this life as i never felt happy and never will!
I just wanted to be that fucking normal, average man like the other 98% of people of my age. But i am not...so i suffer and live in despair!
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Old 10-28-16, 06:25 PM   #2
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That is terrible, man. I can understand why you are feeling the way you do. Being in a relationship is a very important and, most of the time, enjoyable part of life. I haven't been with a woman in about 2 decades. So I feel your pain. I totally have forgotten what it is like. Have you ever tried counseling? I am not a trained professional, so I have no idea how to go about this.

Hopefully you will eventually find a way of coping. Feel better soon.
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Last edited by FromTheHeart; 10-28-16 at 06:29 PM.
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Old 11-03-16, 02:36 PM   #3
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Almost everyone feels unhappy about the way they look at some point in their life, but your belief in your own ugliness borders on the pathological. You might be suffering from an anxiety disorder known as body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) that causes a person to have a distorted view of how they look and to spend a lot of time worrying about their appearance. The condition usually starts when a person is a teenager and can lead to thoughts of suicide. You should definitely see your doctor who will recommend you to a therapist.
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Old 11-26-16, 03:50 AM   #4
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flatliner I can empathise with what you are saying, are you currently seeing a professional?

I myself haven't been in a relationship for years either because people cannot see beyond looks but that does not mean you should give up
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Old 11-26-16, 12:54 PM   #5
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No i don't see any kind of professional and i will never gonna see one! Nobody can change the way i look or the way the society values other people. So is just a waste of time and money. And anyway i don't go out of my home and i hate being around other people.
I am just so depressed ... I really wished i was a different person, average, normal...not the outcast lonely introvert... I really wish i could enjoy life as others do... I honestly feel so pathetic, miserable and sad... I am so tired of everything. i am tired of crying, hurting, suffering ,breathing... It's awful because i am 19 and instead of having fun and have experiences and enjoy the moment, i see my life going on without been ABLE to do anything and just feel miserable and doing nothing but to lock myself in my fucking room...and i fear the tomorrow...when i would be 40 (if i ever reached that age) and realized that my life was just i waste time and did nothing...
Man it's just terrible... I really really really wished i was a different person! I am just so depressed and there is no way out of this! Everyday is a struggle and painful experience. I have no a single fucking reason to wake up the next day. I am so sad. I really am. And i know nobody can help me!:(
Not a professional, no drugs, no fucking suicide forums NO-ONE! I AM ALONE IN HELL AND TRYING TO SURVIVE!!! ;(
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Old 12-03-16, 07:50 PM   #6
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I wish someone can help me! I just really wish there is something, anything, magical that could have been done and liberate my life from this...and give me a chance to be happy in this torturing life ... i am just so sad...keep crying more and more... i have nothing to care about in life anymore. The worst part of this is the fact that i firmly and honestly believe that i am-was a good and kind person in my life. I didn't do nothing wrong to anyone. I never thought anything evil-bad for no-one in this life! I didn't hurt anyone in any way possible. So why am i suffering now? Why? Why i have to go through all this and never be able to feel any slight hapinness in my life? Man, i mean it's just so unfair. I can see mean rude people all around me being happy and enjoy life in every aspect and in the meantime i am forced to live in a torturing hell alone! I am tired of all this! I am exhausted! I really am!
I want to share this as well with you...the few times that i feel decent and get out of my house, and go out in the world, and see how many people are enjoying their life, happy couples walking together, holding hands,kissing or even a company of friends laughing and having fun, while i am walking alone with my head down and having society treating me as a second class human being (due to my ugliness, child looking appearance etc) it hurts me like hell, i feel my heart burning..evaporising..it's just so unberable feeling.. and i can't do nothing at all about that...i just keep my head down until i reached my fucking hole (room) again and break down in tears... Cos i know that i could never be happy like those guys i saw... and became more depressed and making me regret coming out of my room...
I am so alone, pathetic, desperate! I really wish that was just an awful nigthmare! But it's not! It's my fucking real life.
Dear listener, honestly don't know for how long i am gonna be able to live with that. I feel like a disable man which is impossible for him to ever walk in his life. It's just the same feeling...not be able to do what you mostly wanna do in life! I empathise with those people!
I believe that my time is limited in this world...i don't see me surviving this cruelty no more. I REALLY WISH THINGS WERE DIFFERENT! I said it many times but it's true! Just be gratefull of life anyone...if you ever have even a slight chance of being happy in this life don't waste it! I want you to know that a lot of people would like to be in your situation than theirs! But they can't and are destined to suffer ireversibly every single day that they are breathing! Please just remember this from a hurt and completly helpless soul! My tears are running down my face right now!
Sorry for the long response anyone who bothers read this! I am tired of living like this... really now what's the point of living if your are suffering in every second that passes and you know that this is not gonna change for ever? WHY I HAVE TO SUFFER LIKE THIS...
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Old 12-06-16, 07:11 PM   #7
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Hey man, it is absolutely horrible what you have to go through. A lot of people are jugded and shunned because of their looks. People avoid me too because of how I look. But maybe it is still a good idea to go look for a decent psychologist. You might not find one right away, but if you keep looking you will.
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Old 12-15-16, 06:23 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FromTheHeart View Post
But maybe it is still a good idea to go look for a decent psychologist. You might not find one right away, but if you keep looking you will.
This is good advice. Sure you can't change the way you look, but if its something like BDD as mentioned previously, it may be just you who sees yourself as ugly in the same way someone with an eating disorder sees themselves as fat.

I don't think height should be too much of a barrier because there are plenty of women who are short themselves. I'm about 5'9" but probably half of my exes were 5'3" or less. I also never had a girlfriend before I was 19 and married shortly before turning 22, so don't give up.

Please be kind to yourself. You deserve love and happiness in your life.
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Old 01-09-17, 04:30 AM   #9
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I compleatly agree with you about being ugly so it's hard to be accepted. It is also one of my issues
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Old 01-13-17, 06:43 PM   #10
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Man I am felling your pain life can be very tough especially when you feel the way you do. Take it from me girls go more on confidence than anything else, a guy with confidence will have more luck than a guy that doesn't no matter how they look.
I am a good looking guy so I get told but I am quite shy and have low self esteem and no confidence in my self this has made my life a very lonely place and I'm likely to never meet a girl ether even tho I get quite a bit of attention from the opposite sex.
I bet your not half as bad as you think and with confidence and thing is possible. Go to work on your confidence learn to love your self and life will be good.
It's easy for me to tell you this even tho I'm struggling but it's true.
Hope you feeling better
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